Best Phone Call Ever

I still hate phones, but daycare just called me and I must admit, I'm so glad they did. For that call was the most amusing of amusing calls of all time.

Me: Hello? (Much hesitation in voice because wise and cherished caller ID already warned me it was daycare -- that can't be good.)

Daycare Owner Lady: Hi Burgh Baby's Mom. It's Daycare Owner Lady. Nothing is wrong with your baby.

Me: OK. (Much confusion in voice because if she's not sick, then this really can't be good--did she beat somebody up for touching her Play-Doh?)

Daycare Owner Lady: Can you pick Lexie up by 5:00 today? We're calling everybody because babies are throwing up all over teachers and teachers are a mess and we need to close early so that we can clean up and can you pick her up by 5:00?

Me: No problem (Still confused--I always pick her up before 5:00. Is there some sort of traffic disaster in my future that will prevent me from driving 11 miles in under 1.5 hours? Is there? Because if so, I'm leaving now. Oh and there's a little annoyance in my voice as well because I'm thinking "Freakin' frackin' don't call my kid 'Lexie' for goodness sake, you can call her Lex, Alex, Ali, Kinnley, A. Mac, or Poopsy for all I care, just don't call her Lexie. Grr.")

Daycare Owner Lady: Oh, good because it's really just such a mess here and wow the teachers are really just a mess and kids are throwing up all over the place and . . . (There was more, but my little brain lost the ability to focus on the run-on sentence and promptly shut down.)

Awesome, for -oh- so many reasons.

1. If I have to get puked on, everyone should get puked on. Yay!
2. Nobody bothered to tell me this thing was going around daycare last week. So take that! teachers and Daycare Owner Lady who didn't think it would be appropriate to tell me the flu was making the rounds. It circled right back to you, now didn't it?
3. That was the first time Daycare Owner Lady called and I actually got more than three words in. I consider that a personal victory.
4. My kid is not one of the sick ones. Oh wait, that's because she already had it. Darn.
5. The call came at 11:00 am. That's lunch time at daycare. Picture the scene as 50 maybe 60 kids all sit down to eat lunch then they start to get sick, one after the other. While I really do feel bad for the kids, that is still an awesome little image in my head.
6. There will likely be lots of absences at daycare tomorrow. Yay! More attention for Alexis!