Wednesday, January 30

All the Fun Stuff is in the Kid's Room

Since there simply can never be enough animals in this house, quite a while ago Mr. Husband and I decided to put a saltwater aquarium in Alexis' room. I have to admit, despite the fact that it cost a small fortune to set the thing up, it has turned out to be a good decision. Countless mornings I have trudged into Alexis' room to wake her up only to find that she was already wide awake, standing next to the aquarium staring at her fish.

At one point in time, she had two fish. There was the Nemo-looking fish that Daddy picked out, and the crazy cool Mandarin Goby that I selected. Daddy did much research before picking his fish. I saw a psychedelic bright-colored thing and bought it on the spot. Irony of all ironies, my fish turned out to be a meat-eater. So the fourteen-year vegetarian had to set out and find sources of live animals for Mandy (my fishy's name) to eat. I was hatching brine shrimp, buying crazy expensive INVISIBLE things called pods online, and cutting up pieces of frozen dead gunk to feed him. Then we went to Indiana for Thanksgiving, and Mandy died of starvation because he ran out of food sources while we were gone. I probably should mention that I had ordered Mandy a delicious bag full of hundreds of invisible things that arrived while we were gone. Mandy's food died in the mailbox while we were in Indy and while he was starving to death. How's that for a whole bunch of senseless deaths at one time?

Admittedly, I was sort of relieved when Mandy kicked the bucket. Keeping live food sources around for him was some serious work, and not cheap. He was going through $20 worth of food per month. The two cats combined don't eat $20 worth of food in a month, and one of them is a fat slob. I never once enjoyed the whole raising brine shrimp process, especially when the goal was to watch a fish devour hundreds of them in a matter of minutes. His death was a good thing. Really.

Remember I said I thought the invisible things died in the mailbox? I actually dumped the bag in the aquarium for kicks, just on the off chance that one or two had survived. I think it's safe to say at least two survived. It turns out the invisible things grow to be less invisible. Then some of them grow to be almost big. Those no longer invisible things? Look just like bugs and worms. Gross, nasty, little bugs and worms. And now that there is no predator for icky critters, they are proliferating. It has reached the point where I'm no longer willing to stick my hands in the tank to clean it because that would be like sticking my hand in a bucket full of insects.

Then tonight I thought I would research what the worm-like things that are in the tank are called. Some of them have gotten pretty big--as in at least four inches long. Guess what? The damn things are not only considered pests, they can grow to 12 inches and have been known to BITE HUMANS.

Good thing the tank is in the Toddler's room and not mine, because you couldn't pay me to sleep next to a tank filled with bugs and man-eating worms. The Toddler just better hope her new sleeping buddy, Coal, will protect her.

51 comments:

  1. oh my goodness! That would give me nightmares I think! LOL

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  2. Eeeew! I think I'd be getting another Mandy to clean them up then flush Mandy so I didn't pay $20 a month to keep it fed. Of course, killing fish is a specialty of mine! :)

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  3. We had 4 fish and a fiddler crab in a tank then my hubby gets the bright idea to get a turtle for the tank. The turtle ended up eating 2 of the fish and the crab.

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  4. OK...that aquarium would be right out the door for me. Icky, icky and more icky. I hate creepy crawly things...invisible or not.

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  5. Holy moly, is that common? I've never heard of those things irl!

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  6. that is just nasty. please make hubby fish them out. fish. ha!

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  7. Gosh! I wouldn't want to sleep with such things in a tank next to me either. Would have nightmares, I think, of them crawling all over me!

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  8. Eeew. That would have to go.

    We have an empty fish tank in our basement. We keep telling our son it's going to be set up again when we refinish the basement.

    We. are. lying. Never gonna happen. Nope Never.

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  9. Holy shmitt. That'd put my freak on fur-sure. I'd love to get some fish if only someone would clean the tank (sanz me).

    Coal? What a cute furball. =^..^=

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  10. OMG! That is so funny. Hey, at least you're learning a lot about ecosystems!

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  11. Our local fish store will buy back fish. Maybe Mandy's brother Andy can come visit for a week or two?

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  12. Wait, is that a REAL cat? How come I'm the only one asking that question... do I need glasses?

    And what are you going to DO with the man-eating worms--you can't flush them down the toilet...they might grow HUGE and eat scores of people just like in the MOVIES!!!

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  13. Eww, ick! I would have a heart attack just knowing that was in my house...icky!!

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  14. oh, have I got the heebie-jeebies! ew! ew! ew!

    yeah, grown woman here spazzing out cuz...ew!...gross!...don't like the creepy-crawlies!

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  15. I go away for a week and a half and look what all you get into! LOL!!

    I agree with those who've voted to do SOMETHING about the creepy crawlies! YUCK! LOL!!

    Missed you - now I have to go catch up on the rest of your shenanigans! xoxo

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  16. And you thought my termites were icky? At least we couldn't really see them and they don't BITE HUMANS!

    Sheesh... what if Alexis decides one morning to reach in and pet Nemo??

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  17. It's like some crazy horror movie. Poor thing!

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  18. yikes . . . bugs. Ugh.

    My goldfish once went down the drain when I was cleaning the tank. I cried and cried (I was 15). My dad actually rescued him! He was in the trap! He lived another FIVE years. That was one tough fish.

    Fish in a tank is about the only "tank" creature I can do.

    Remember SEA MONKEYS???? Weren't they brine shrimp? I thought they were alien creatures.

    What a cute kitty and kiddie pic!

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  19. Maybe you need another meat eating fish just to clean out the tank? Maybe you could borrow one from someone.

    Or maybe you could keep them and see how big they grow. Hey! You could turn your pond into an outdoor, saltwater, biting worm thing habitat. Just to keep people on their toes.

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  20. Okay, now I am seriously freaked out. Those things won't eat the Nemo-fish will they? I would love to have a saltwater aquarium but I definitely won't be getting a meat eater!

    RIP Mandy.

    Oh, and Marlee's comment totally cracked me up.

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  21. When I taught preschool, they had a fishtank in our room. After inhaling dirty fish water while trying to clean the tank once, I hated those damn fish, and vowed to never have any of my own. We called them "the fish that wouldn't die".
    So what ARE you gonna do with those nasty people eating worms?! You better hope Alexis doesn't name them and grow attached to the grossness!

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  22. I would freak. Eradicate them at all cost!

    You wanna talk about a fish killer, I cannot keep a goldfish alive for 24 hours.

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  23. What??? I would take the entire tank and chuck it out the window. Creepy!!!
    That is the exact reason (ok, maybe not the exact reason) that Santa brought the boys a fish tank light. It looks like a fish tank, but it is just a light that you plug into the wall. They love it! And no cleaning. And no worms that bite people!!! Weehooo!!
    Look at that precious picture! Is she the new animal whisperer or what?

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  24. I think your husband should be in charge of cleaning that out!

    Good luck!

    Kimmy

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  25. Sorry. I am notnotnot forwarding this post to my MIL who desperately wants to buy an aquarium setup for BigBrother. But with two under foot, I can't possibly manage a fish tank right now. I mean, I killed fish after fish in college. I just can't do it right now! AHHHH.

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  26. Mr. Husband kindly reminded me last night that he has a degree in Zoology while I have a degree in Spanish Translation. He has volunteered to rid Nemo's world of worms (although, I have to say they don't seem to have done any harm to this point--lots of coral is alive in well in there, Nemo is all good, the snails are happy, and the little crab is growing crazy fast).

    I knew I married that man for a reason.

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  27. Oh, and Marlee, that is Mr. Coal Kitty. He's 7 pounds of love and affection and absolutely real. I've got the claw marks to prove it.

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  28. I am totally, TOTALLY skeeved out right now!!! I'm with Deb...I think you need a new Mandy.

    We couldn't keep fish alive either. Which is why we now have a lizard living in the tank.

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  29. I'd be right there with buying a meat eater to eat the buggie things and then flush it.
    I did something similar, only I bought a catfish. Thought it would be neat and filled the tank with tetras and guppies.
    It ate everything.
    We put it in the pond. It eats koi. Finally a heron ate it.

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  30. I feel the sudden urge to scratch.

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  31. I'm totally ick-ed out by this. Seriously. I have a bug phobia, and now I am going to add gross water bugs and worms to my list...

    I love the idea of having a fish tank in the baby's room, but I just am no good about keeping them clean. Maybe I should get one of those aquarium lights...

    Oh, and Marlee's comment also made me laugh. I have visions of B horror movies, maybe with some MST3K narrative...

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  32. Oh what a very sweet picture. And it sounds like you need another predator. Maybe the fish store will let you borrow one for a few days?
    Pop over to my blog and pick up something that's waiting for you. :)

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  33. EGADS woman!! Get thee to the toilet and FLUSH FLUSH FLUSH! Better to destroy the whole tank than have Alexis begin to get nightmares about swimming with man eating bugs. EWWW

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  34. ewwwwwwwwwwwwww.

    i hate fish. i hate icky invisible things that grow to be 12 inches long and bite humans even more than i hate fish.

    which is a lot.

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  35. I agree with all the ewww's and heebie jeebies. You should contact your local high school and see if they want to use them in their science class. Anything to get them out of your house.

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  36. This settles it, I won't be getting an aquarium!

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  37. just stopping by via melissa over at hope for the hopeless.

    what an adorable girlie you have!!

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  38. You let her sleep with man-eating worms in her room? When she's a teenager, all of her friends will think you're the freaking coolest mom ever!

    I myself would throw a plugged in blow-dryer into the tank in the hopes that they all die of electrocution because I wouldn't be able to sleep knowing they were in the same house I live in.

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  39. I think I am going to have a hard time sleeping now because I will be thinking of those darn biting, worm and insect things swimming around....I think that tank needs to talk a walk into the woods, never to be seen again.

    Seriously - 12 inches of human biting grossness....YUK!

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  40. Eww! I had a fish once who I found belly up in it's small fish bowl after being away 3 days....Called in my maintenance man to come and dump out the entire thing outside my apt because I was so scared!.....Yup, and I'm a nurse :)

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  41. beanhead7:59 PM

    Just had to say I am new to all of this , also in the Pittsburgh area and I love love your blog !!! I look forward to lots of reading and following all of Alexis terrible twos ,lol , I should have done this with my kiddos..man what an idea I could have used this against them at some point for like bribary ya know ??!! Well I have really enjoyed reading and ohh big steelers FAN HERE , IM WITH YA ON THAT !!

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  42. Beanhead8:01 PM

    http://dontcallmebeanhead.blogspot.com/
    P.S. here I am , I dont knwo why it didnt show... Im new remember .. =)

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  43. Ugh! We had a pet gecko for six long years. And thank God it didn't live for its potential life span of TWENTY YEARS. Yes, I'm cruel but I considered flushing it from day one. It ate only live crickets and wasn't exactly the kind of pet that gives back. You know what I mean.

    Oh, BTW, I started reading your blog because I grew up in Mt. Lebanon but keep reading it because your blog's awesome!

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  44. you are brave! i'd flush those things down the toilet!!! :)

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  45. How do you get 45 comments on one post? Wow....

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  46. I cannot flippin' believe how popular you are getting! WOW! All I have to say about that is IT'S ABOUT DANG TIME!

    Ok, now with regard to your not so invisible thing dilemma:

    During my long flight delay last night, I had plenty of time to think about your wormy problem. While I agree that doing something about them is necessary, I fear that flushing them could initially result in something like this with an ultimate potential outcome of THIS! ;o) So, in the interest of the preservation of the human species, maybe it'd be better to just follow catwoman's advice and give them an electrified blow job!

    XOXOXO
    http://damama2all.blogspot.com/

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  47. I read off and on...always forget to add to my reader (which I just did!).
    What I noticed on your picture is the mark on Alexis' head....is that a strawberry hemangioma (spelling?)? My daughter (age 3) has two, one on her arm and the other on her side. We see the derm at CHOP next week about removal. But wanted another parent's opinion. Then I read you blog and tada...that is why I ask!
    Thanks!

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  48. Disgusting! The picture is too cute. I hope the toddler stays out of the tank.

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  49. Tranny Head just ordered me to RUN over here and read this story. I do not have a fish tank of horrors, but I did just blog about my tank. I am a fish-owner-no-longer....

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  50. Kids really love this so much!!

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