Sunday, February 17

About Those Prisoners

It's no secret that Mr. Husband has a soft spot for animals. When I first started dating him, he had an iguana named Chuck and a cat named George (why yes, he is good at naming pets). All he ever talked about was how he would eventually have a Bulldog. Getting a Bulldog was, for a long time, his biggest dream. I think it's pretty well documented that I am not a fan of the smelly, noisey things. I mean, I love Meg, but I don't exactly like her most days.

The road to his dream was a long one. Early on, money was the deciding factor for why he didn't have one. They aren't exactly the cheapest of pups, and Airmen do not walk around with a few thousand dollars to spend on a dog. After he got out of the Air Force, he went to college. College students also do not have a few thousand dollars lying around. All through the broke days, I reveled in the knowledge that I was safe from the attack of the Bulldog.

The drawback from having a dream that was truly not attainable at the time was that he tried to fill the alleged void with other animals. He spent his first thirty years dreaming of that dog. He also spent his first thirty years dragging assorted critters home. As a kid, his mom limited him to the occassional rodent. Once he moved out, he moved on to bigger things. Oh, there were still the occasional Guinea pigs and hamsters to be found, but it wasn't until he was under his own roof that he brought on the reptile phase.

I was not a fan of the reptile phase. There have been three iguanas (Chuck, Norm, and Lou) and a Chameleon (Ernie) under our roof at some time or another. The last of the lizards finally died this past summer. One of the happiest days of my life was when I saw that iguana cage finally make the trek to the trash, signaling the end of the era.

In the midst of the reptile phase was a brief hedgehog phase. Grommit was his name, and he was essentially a prickly Guinea Pig. Looking back at it, Grommit was the closest thing to a bulldog that we've had, other than Meg. He was a lot smaller than the Bully baby, but the prickles meant he was sitting wherever he wanted to sit no matter what we tried to say about it, he grunted CONSTANTLY, he ate all sorts of random and weird things, and the cats avoided him just as much as the avoid Meg now. I don't think anyone shed any tears when he died.

After college, it became clear that all the small critters were doing nothing to temper the desire for a Bulldog. Mr. Husband had three cats to entertain himself with, all his other small creatures, and yet he was still left wanting. So he began his full court press for his dog. That led to Jasmine. I'm sure you're thinking that a Lhasa Apso is the furthest thing from a Bulldog, and in some ways, you're right. But Lhasas are very cool dogs in that they behave like big dogs, but don't eat big dog quantities of food or take up big dog space.

The short story of how Jasmine managed to come home with us was that Mr. Husband and I had a GINORMOUS fight in a pet store when he tried so hard to get me to let him buy a Bulldog puppy there that we actually ended up in a screaming fight in the middle of the store. It was the kind of fight where everyone in the vicinity stops what they are doing to stare. Why yes, we are some classy people, yes we are. Anyway, later that day I was still fuming, he was still pushing, and we walked past a poofy little baby Lhasa Apso. I said something to the effect of, "The only kind of dog you're getting is one of those things." And so it was.

It took another few years before I finally caved to Mr. Husband's Bulldog passion. I don't know if that means he's more stubborn than me, or if it's just a matter of me finally running out of excuses. I will say that if he thinks he's getting another one when Meg passes away, you might want to make your reservations for the fight. It's going to be a good one, I'm sure. Especially since I strongly suspect this one will be taking his side in the fight:



I'm screwed, aren't I?

35 comments:

  1. Yep, you are screwed. Pay per view might want to book that fight now, cuz it would be a big ticket item. Love the picture - she's like, "Hey, don't look at me! You married him".

    ReplyDelete
  2. I like lizards! I actually used to have an iguana named Lou too lol.

    We've had turtles, leopard geckos, you name it.

    I love english bulldogs... but they ARE stinky!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Mr. Hubby is the new Dr. Doolittle I'm thinking. You never know. You may start to like bulldogs. Pup HATED Cairns...until Lanna decided he was the best thing since sliced bread.

    You are not just silly billy Burgh. You're silly billy burgh with a glass menagerie.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Fat chance on the liking Bulldogs. If the sweetest pup in the world can't win me over, I can't be won. It would take a dog that bathed itself, didn't fart constantly, never snored, stayed off my couch, didn't eat furniture and walls, never barked for no good reason, and wasn't dumber than a rock to make me like it.

    Oh wait, I think I just described Jasmine.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hi, Burgh!

    I really like the changes you've made, it turned out great!

    Um,..yeah, you're screwed. BTW, I love all the outfits and jewelry Alexis is always flaunting, she's quite the fashionista!

    Lizzy

    ReplyDelete
  6. Ok. So I've been somewhat MIA lately. *shrug* I'm here now.

    First, LOVE the new look, babe!

    Second, in our house, the one that has the magical powers over all living things not human.... that would be my oldest child. I swear, we'd have a full scale menagerie if I said yes to even a minute portion of the critters he'd like to bring home!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Loving the new layout, loving the bling on the toddler! And I agree with the rest of the commenters - Screwed. You. Sorry about that!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Totally. Screwed.

    A grunting little hedgehog sounds so cuuuute. I want one.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I like his strategy. I am training up my boys to ask for a dog. My husband does not want one, so I hope the kids can convince him.

    ReplyDelete
  10. I agree with jen- get pay per view in on the fight so at least you can make some money out of this fight.

    That is quite a zoo you have been running all these year. I'm not a big reptile or rodent person. I do like dogs. But, my inlaws had a Lhasa Apso -it was the MEANEST dog I have ever met. For something so little and cute- it struck terror in the hearts of us all. (wait- that sounds just like a toddler!)

    ReplyDelete
  11. If you truly don't want any more you've gotta start working on Alexis now. Because that kid has some serious sway.

    My son wants a lizard and we've been putting it off. Any thoughts?

    ReplyDelete
  12. You are screwed. And I'm partial to any person for a love of animals - so Mr. Burgh sounds very cool by me. :)

    ReplyDelete
  13. Yes ma'am you are definitely screwed!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. What is it with men and bulldogs? My hubby wants one too and has been harping on it since we got married. I told him we already have a slobbering creature --no, not the baby. Our cat who is mentally deficient and drools all over the place. Close enough I say. But no, the husband keeps whining about it and saying "awww they are sooo cute.." when he sees one on TV. So, is it because they are lazy and lay around all day -- is this what attracts MEN to this breed? I think that is very very possible.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Also, like the new look.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Umm, yes, I think you are. I love dogs, but I'm not really a dog person because I've never had one. I'd really like one just to take on walks!

    ReplyDelete
  17. You should hold some kind of contest and the first 20 callers get free tickets to the brawl. I. would. call.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Yeah, you're screwed. But so is my hubby. Cause I'm instilling my love for animals into the Pumpkin as early as possible. hehe. And I love the bulldogs...

    Incidently, if you don't want a dog like what you described in the comments, don't get a beagle. Or any hound dog really. For me, the good qualities make up for all those bad ones, but she is a snoring, drooling, stinky, barky garbage disposal. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  19. Oh, and I think this is my second fav pic of Alexis! (My fav is that one of her sleeping on the beach, which I'm so glad you made part of your new layout!)

    ReplyDelete
  20. Oh yeah. You're screwed, alright! Who could say no the that face?
    I love hedgehogs! I think they are the cutest!
    Love the new look!

    ReplyDelete
  21. You are totally screwed. Fascinatingly, I wrote about this very subject in today's blog. Great minds think alike?

    ReplyDelete
  22. Yeah, but so what. Why the heck not? I can think of a zillion vices he could have and none of them is cooler or cuter than a bulldog. You'll survive. Just make sure he's in charge of poop duty.

    Gosh, I LOVE that header!!!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Did you marry a zookeeper!?

    And yes, you're totally screwed!

    ReplyDelete
  24. You're screwed for sure!

    My hubby went through a scorpion phase. He had them when we met and I was so happy when the last one bought the freaking farm.

    ReplyDelete
  25. A hedgehog? Really? I didn't know those could even BE pets.

    Bulldogs are SO expensive and (it's a long story), but we got Baxter for free when he was a puppy and I gave him to my hubby for his 30th b-day. He'd always wanted one (much like Mr. Husband, minus the weird reptiles and rodents), and when we were dating we had a "buy a bulldog" box where we chunked our loose change. With the realization that our BABY (ooops...we're pregnant) needed that change and that it would take us an ETERNITY to save enough money for one, we gave up. Then, a few years later we were "blessed" (I'm using that word loosely) with Baxter.

    ReplyDelete
  26. I guess your hubby feels about Bull dogs the way I do about a Brittany. And although my Brittany farts, he doesn't drool and has the neediness of a cat where he'll walk into a room and go hey, I'm over here if you need me.

    Unlike Satan's Dog, your typical lab, who feels like crawling up my uterus is the only way he can truly be close enough to me.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Oh and I absolutely adore the new look and am AMAZED that you did that by yourself. I am completely challenged when it comes to HTML and can't even fathom doing anything to my page without a professional.

    You are my hero.

    ReplyDelete
  28. yeah, you are screwed. on the other hand, you actually LIVED through the reptile and rodent stage. that alone would have sent me screaming from the house.

    (we still have one remaining bearded dragon. fortunately, the mice have all gone to their happy places. only the 2 nasty rat dogs and all those damned fish remain.)

    ReplyDelete
  29. Hi, I've "seen" you around and wanted to come check out your blog. And I am so glad I did, because I LOVE it! Your little one is precious!
    My husband has the same obsession with getting a bassett hound. I told him the current dog has to die first, then I get a year's break from canines, then he has to take off 2 months to housetrain the thing. I think it's pretty fair!

    ReplyDelete
  30. yeah...you're screwed!

    Unfortunately I'm a bit like Mr. Husband since all of the critters we've ever had are MY doing. At least I can say I never did rodents (afraid the cats would kill them and I'm not keen on "nature" like that) and didn't do lizards/reptiles (um, I'm just too squeemish...they creep me out). I made a side comment of wanting to get one of our breeder's retiring adult dogs and Justin automatically responded, "when the cats are gone" without even looking up. I've decided that if I want the cats to live if I have to croak before them, that I'll have to write that in my will and set up an account for them, or else he'd boot them out the door on his way in from my funeral. ;)

    ReplyDelete
  31. My husband has been trying for the last 10 years to let me get a snake. I HATE SNAKES, TERRIFIED OF THEM! I can't even go into a pet store if they have snakes.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Are we married to the same man (except for the reptile phase)? My husband went to the pound every week for 1 1/2 years looking for a bulldog. I laughed. Then one day I got called at work because there was actually 2 at the pound. He brought one home. That was 16 years ago and we are on bulldog #2 which didn't come from the pound, but a breeder 3 states over while he was in training for the AF. Oh, and he had 3 cats.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Oh you're screwed. I so feel for you.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Yes, you're screwed. And, sorry to say, it isn't the only arguement of that magnitude that she will help Mr. H win.

    ReplyDelete
  35. From someone who knows how to get the kids to be on my animal lovin side...I will say you are deffinately screwed.Big C loves animals to but he is from the country where dogs are just dogs and they are supposed to be outside.Ummm no.

    I love reptiles...hopefully gettin a crested gecko soon.Used to have a bearded dragon and a leopard gecko.I also love dogs and want lots and lots of them one day when we grow up and own a house with lots of land.

    Good luck with your fight.I am sure it won't be easy with the kid on his side.They can be quite convincing.

    ReplyDelete