Saturday, October 25

If You Aren't Old Enough to Vote, Your Skirt Better be Down to Your Knees

Last night Alexis attended her first ever Halloween Party. It was something she had been eagerly looking forward to attending, so despite the fact that she was a total and complete butthole at daycare yesterday, I begrudgingly let her go. The "begrudgingly" wasn't just because she very much so deserved to spend her night locked in the basement closet with rats and cockroaches either. It was also because 50 TODDLERS. 50! In one place. Together. At once. With the kids outnumbering the adults. 50!

The party took place at the facility where Alexis goes for gymnastics lessons, so there were some familiar faces in the crowd. That may very well be the only reason I survived the evening filled with screaming short people. Well, that, and the fact that there was much "observing" to do.

In fact, I learned a lot about toddler costumes last night. For example, I learned that it is a Minnie Mouse sort of year. I guess Alexis wasn't the only 2-year old to have her heart set on the polka-dotted dress because there were no less than eight Minnies in attendance. That was GREAT news to the one and only Mickey. That little guy was in heaven with all that girly rat tail running around.

I also learned that Hannah Montana is quite the phenom amongst the not-yet-in-kindergarten crowd. She was also all over the place. Or, at least I think it was her. It's hard to tell when there are so few Toddlers willing to wear a wig for more than a few seconds.

However, the most prevalent costumes for little girls were High School Musical related. There were girls in little cheerleader outfits. There were girls in Sharpay outfits. There were girls in THIS Sharpay outfit. Um, that costume? Is a FAIL. Mamas, please don't dress your four-year olds up in skimpy, provocative clothing. That costume shouldn't be worn by anybody, but most especially not by the Yo Gabba Gabba crowd.

*steps off soap box*

Anyway, I guess all my muttering about how it would be nice if people would put actual clothes on their kids when in public was heard by a certain little someone with big ears. Today she and I went on a little shopping expedition and at one point came across two sluts lovely high school-aged girls dressed up in their whore-ish lovely Halloween costumes. One was the Slutty Cop and the other was the Slutty Prisoner. Very classy. As they strutted past us, Alexis looked up at me and asked the million dollar question, "Momma, where those girls' clothes?"

32 comments:

  1. That is one skimpy outfit.Why would anyone put their toddler in that.

    Alexis is a very cute Minnie Mouse.The one and only Mickey at the party was surely happy I am sure.

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  2. Anonymous3:43 AM

    You have to love Alexis. I mean, we know you have to, but we all do too.

    And seriously people, kids do not need mini skirts! I wish people would stop buying me mini skirts for Amy because Hello? She is TWO! She doesn't need to wear that kinda thing.

    Okay, I'm off my soapbox now too.

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  3. I flat out forbade any Hannah Montana costume.

    And, ohmygosh! How cute is your little Minnie Mouse? Must smooch her.

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  4. I'm quite relieved that I have boys to dress. Now if I can just keep their pants up where they're supposed to be. Don't think I won't threaten the use of a hot-glue gun or staple gun to achieve that end. Or rainbow suspenders.

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  5. We walked by a similar pair the other day in Target, my husband did a double take as usual, and then he saw that they were maybe 17.

    He gagged and then tied our two-year old Charlotte to the cart and told her she was becoming a Mormon.

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  6. Yeah. I took my 13 year old to a party on Friday night. She wore a floor length gown. She was the only one who had her behind covered. Me thinks she'll try to be that way too next year. I've got one year to figure out a way to stop THAT. Sigh. I mean, thirteen!!

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  7. They wore that to the mall?! How was the noise level with 50 kids in one place?

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  8. LOL!! I'm still laughing--smart girl!!

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  9. Anonymous9:22 AM

    She is so wise for being so young.

    While being excited to actually be having a girl, I must say the clothing options frighten the heck out of me. There is no way my little girl will dress like a 2 bit whore.

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  10. I got a catalog from a party store and it featured a lot of kid costumes. I was floored by how small the sizes were for the slutty costumes.

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  11. It really pisses me off that clothing options for young girls (forget costumes...that's a complete waste of time) are so risque. WTH? Why can't young girls look like young GIRLS and not tarts?!

    Minnie Mouse is a doll!

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  12. Anonymous10:14 AM

    Never. Never will my kid dress like that. Should she decide she will override my decision, there WILL be a rumble and I WILL win.

    Minnie Alexis? Adorable.

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  13. To Leanne: What's to figure out? You are the mother and you ARE ALLOWED to say she can not go out of the house looking like that. GASP! either she dresses appropriately or she does not go to the party. period.

    I have two daughters, who are now 33 and 34 years old. One of them constantly tried to dress in the slutty, sexy look way back when she was in her teens. All it took was one LOOK from me to send her stomping back upstairs to change her clothes before she left the house. And then I went up there and got the offending clothing and threw it away as soon as she walked out the door.

    There is too much of young girls dressing in that slutty look these days, and I always wonder what their mothers are thinking when I see them dressed that way. Yeah, the child may not like you for a while, but hey, they aren't supposed to like you, they're supposed to obey you. And then when they grow up they will love you so much for raising them right. Ok, I'm off MY soapbox now.

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  14. Girl...I couldn't agree with you more! The Zoo had their party yesterday (our house is on the way) all afternoon I saw a march of little girls who I assume were Hanna M.

    They were way to young to be dressin' like that...

    That Minnie costume...so cute!!!

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  15. Alexis looks adorable as Minnie!!! We were talking about this whole subject in the salon this week.

    Best costume idea I've heard this year is Amy Swinehouse. Amy Winehouse with a pig nose! LOL

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  16. Ha! I took my 9 year old daughter to party city to get a Halloween costume and it was horrifying. My sixteen year old son was even more horrified than I was. He kept saying "MOM, you are NOT going to let her dress up as a baby prostitute are you?" It was hard to find anything that didn't look slutty. In the end we left, bought her a suit and a Fedora at Burlington Coat factory and dressed her up as 20's style gangster. Very cute. Until someone at Zoo Boo today said "Look at how cute! A little pimp." Sigh.

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  17. I do not understand who dresses their little girls up like sluts. Toddlers in mini skirts or with things like "juicy" or "sexy" on their butts? What is wrong with people!

    When I was in high school, I tried to wear miniskirts and those see through shirts that showed your bra underneath (remember those?). My mother said to me that I could not go out of the house showing my underwear. Ever. It was not appropriate. While I was frustrated because "it was the style," I understood. Now, I thank her for not letting me out of the house dressed like that.

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  18. Don't EVEN get me started on the whorification of little girls. Try finding a decent, age-appropriate dress in a size 10/12. It was even harder to do with sizes 6, and 7/8. I hate clothes shopping for the Howler.

    And don't get me started on the Bratz dolls, either. It just gets UGLY really fast.

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  19. Okay first of all - look at her little ponytail! When did she grow that kind of hair? Go, Alexis.

    And I've come to realize that Halloween brings out the slut in any costume. Becky wants to be candy corn this year (why yes, my teenager wants to dress up and I'm loving it) and even THAT is slutty.

    http://cgi.ebay.com/CHILDS-CANDY-CORN-WITCH-GIRLS-HALLOWEEN-COSTUME-MD_W0QQitemZ310093224327QQihZ021QQcategoryZ80914QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem

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  20. Okay, how does one add a link to a comment?

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  21. ok, i could have SWORN i already commented on this, but apparently it was a sugar-induced hallucination.

    candy corn, anyone?

    and my girl wants to be a mouse for halloween. not minnie or mickey. just a mouse. sigh

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  22. And then people wonder why their jr. and sr. high school teenage girls wind up pregnant! But that's a rant I've already covered over in my corner of the world, so I'll spare you here. I'm glad to see that the Toddler has some common sense. I hope for your sake she is able to retain it through the teenage years.

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  23. I'm glad she realizes trampy when she sees it. Also, who is Sharpay?

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  24. LOL yes the costumes are wonderful this year aren't they?! I must admit that Kass and Kam are going as a HSM cheerleader and basketball player, but they're NOT skimpy costumes (well duh, of course Kam's isn't! LOL). Kass wanted to go as the lifeguard Gabriella which had REALLY short shorts and I said, NO WAY!!! Mean mama.

    I'm pretty sad to hear it's a Minnie Mouse year! I was hoping Kennedy would be rare! LOL Oh well, it sounds like Keeghan is in good shape with Mickey! He'll have his choice of mouse babes!

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  25. Eww - what's wrong with people putting tiny kids in slut-tacular clothes? I am equally horrified when I see tiny children wearing clothes that say "juicy" across the arse.

    Yikes.

    Alexis, on the other hand, is hawt!

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  26. Wow that outfit is just wrong!

    I'm glad that Alexis was the ever classy minnie mouse!

    Child Icons should be fully clothed in all situations!

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  27. LMAO! Gad you are teaching her about hoes early!!!

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  28. Did you tell her that they were in their enormous purses and that they changed after the Mommas dropped them off and if she EVER pulls that one she's in big trouble?

    Love her.

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  29. Ha ha ha ha - love it! (The photo is great, too!)

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  30. WTF??? I wouldn't let my teenager wear that Sharpay costume, much less put it on my young child!!!

    My oldest, who is 8, is going as Gabriella. And, wearing a costume dress that goes down to her knees. She wouldn't have wanted to wear a short anything!

    UGH!

    Also, my 2 year old daughter is a panda this year. Where there lots of Pandas?

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  31. Cute and Smart! LOL! As for moms dressing their kids like sleazeballs? AACK! I will never understand the need.

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