Wednesday, October 29

Long Live Mrs. Goodbee and Her Mystical Toddler Entertaining Ways

I had a dream. A dream about a dollhouse. In that dream, I bought Alexis the biggest, fanciest, old style wooden dollhouse you have ever seen. I, er, I mean we would spend hours arranging tiny wooden furniture and placing little pieces of perfectly cut carpet and hanging spiffy little pieces of flowery wallpaper and I, er, I mean we would love and cherish that dollhouse for years.

Then I woke up, peered around our tiny little townhouse, and realized that dream will have to wait until I have a big ol' playroom for my, er, I mean her dream dollhouse.

So then came Mrs. Goodbee.



Sure, she's plastic and she makes noise, meaning she is an evil sort of toy, but HOLY HELLOLOLLIPOP does the Toddler love that thing. She plays and plays and plays and plays. Every. single. day. It is by far her absolute favorite toy right now. She's had it for over a month, and the girl still adores it, to the point that it is currently my "threat toy." (As in, "Quit XYZ or I'll take away your dollhouse." It ALWAYS works.)

Somewhere along the happy trail of peacefully playing toddler bliss, we figured we would get the kid some more accessories for her dollhouse. After all, dollhouses sort of require dolls to be fun. So we picked up a few extra dolls and some furniture and all was good.

Until.

Until I watched the Toddler set up a slumber party and realized that there was a very severe shortage of testosterone in her dollhouse.



So off we ran to Target to pick up a boy for the dollhouse. Sadly, Target didn't have any. So, we ran to Wal-Mart, where there was also a total and complete lack of boy action. We tried Toys 'R Us. Lather, rinse, repeat. No. boys. anywhere.

I tried to substitute.



Alexis would have none of that nonsense.

So, off we went to more stores. It took THREE Targets, a Wal-Mart, and TWO Toys 'R Us before we finally found a man.

He was a handy man.



Yes, he is sitting on the toilet. Alexis says, "He's pooping." He's been doing that for several days now. Poor guy.

A few days later, as luck would have it, I found the only other man available for Mrs. Goodbee. And, yes, I do know that I could have bought any little guy, but I have a thing about brands having to match. I seriously will not wear Adidas work out pants with Nike shoes, not even to run to the grocery store. So, there is NO way a Fisher Price dude was walking into Mrs. Goodbee Caring Corners land.



It is positively hysterical (I think) that the man I finally found came complete with a couch and TV. If Mrs. Goodbee were more of a gender neutral sort of toy, it would probably would make me all sorts of cranky that the only two male figures are engaging in such stereotypical behaviors. However, it's definitely a girly sort of toy, and little girls might as well learn early that men like tools and they like to watch TV. A lot. Besides, it only took Alexis and I a few minutes to rectify the overdone gender roles thing.




Make sure that your little boys know that is how life is supposed to look. :-)

So, after much effort and searching, the Mrs. Goodbee kingdom was complete. Except, there seems to be a problem. TV Dude is MISSING. In fact, I haven't been able to find him for two weeks. Also MIA? The Bed Lady. I don't know where the two of them have run off to, but I have torn this tiny townhouse to pieces trying to find them. I mean, I have actually cleaned in an effort to reunite them with the rest of the dollhouse peeps.

I guess Bed Lady was so excited to finally see a man, she's hiding him somewhere so as to not have to share with all the other chicks.




(The above photo is the last time Bed Lady was seen hanging out in Mrs. Goodbee. Come back Bed Lady!)

36 comments:

  1. How can it be that I am first again?!?

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  2. I gotta get one of these for Miss Peach...She would LOVE it!!!

    First again???

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  3. I loves me a handy man in the house. Now that TV man is gone, he'll definitely get all the ladies.

    My niece had all the Polly Pockets. She took all of their clothes and put hot tamale candies in them and had a hot tamale village. Cute as could be.

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  4. i lusted after doll houses. and then i had all those boys.

    wouldn't you know that 13 years later, when i finally birthed a princess ... she would be TOTALLY disinterested in doll houses of ANY kind.

    you are a lucky woman.

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  5. I think the creepy dollhouse actually ate the guy and gal that are missing. They were probably misbehaving one night and urp, she ate them.

    I love how you set up the dwarfs around the lady. You do need your own dollhouse!

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  6. I love it! The Bed Lady is gettin' some!

    As a side note, last Sunday there was a dollhouse show at the same hotel where my church is currently holding services in my area (we're a satellite congregation) while we look for a place to build our church. The group was very disgruntled that they could not have the big conference room that we have permanently rented, so they made all kinds of snide remarks to us when we ladies from the early morning Bible study walked through "their" area to get to our private room.

    There is just something weird about grown people so obsessed with dollhouses, tiny furniture and tiny people that they would be rude to people who are trying to hold church-related services. Maybe they need to find their own Bed Lady or Handyman and relax a little!

    Peace - D

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  7. Wow. There's a LOT of action going on in that bed...

    I nearly choked on my coffee when I got to the picture of the dwarves. I love the way your mind thinks: twistedly awesome.

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  8. Geesh people, get your minds out of the gutter. Bed Lady is just reading the Dwarfs a bedtime story. ;-)

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  9. I always wanted a dollhouse when I was little. I so hope that when we have kids, we have a girl for this reason :) Selfish, I know but it looks like so much fun!

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  10. anglophilefootballfanatic.com8:58 AM

    I love that the man came with his tv and couch - was there a remote? I'm glad to see he looks good in an apron with a doily. The toddler seems to dig the dollhouse. And, the chick in the 1st picture seems to be sitting on the pot.

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  11. Okay, hands down my favorite post EVER! To hilarious especially with the dwarves and then the man in the kitchen.

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  12. LOL I love that you tried to balance the estrogen with dwarves. hehe

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  13. It's like Days of Our Lives over at Mrs. Goodbee's!

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  14. I think that bed lady and handy man have run off together. I love that the guy is sitting on the pot! I hope you, er I mean, The Toddler continues to enjoy the doll house.

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  15. naughty things are afoot in Burgh doll land... Tsk Tsk...

    If they resurface and he goes missing again with a different lady. well... you'll know there are other stereotypical behaviors running amook...

    I love Mrs. Goodbee though. precious...

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  16. whoa, three targets, a wal-mart and two toys r us's. sounds like my own personal nightmare. i loved the dwarfs.

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  17. I don't even want to know what the Bed Lady and the TV guy are doing!!!! Yikes...you may have tiny plastic babies running around soon...what's the gestation period for plastic dolls???

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  18. Clearly, Bed Lady is a ho and has run off with TV Dude to the 7 Dwarves cottage for an orgy. It's because of all the sex stuff she was watching on TV Dude's tv. So sad.

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  19. I wouldn't be so worried about gender roles as I would about what Alexis learns from Bed Lady and TV Guy. Just her name suggests something isn't quite right there.

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  20. HAHA! That thing is hilarious. I'm so glad you finally shared pictures. The dwarves picture cracked me up.

    It is pretty funny that there are only two men and both are, um, manly?

    I have given you two blog awards :) No need to do anything with them, but I heart you so you deserve them.

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  21. Dang, girl, you get a lot of comments! I love "reviews" that keep it real. And thanks for entertaining us with the dwarf picture.

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  22. LOL that was so funny!
    Love the toy, I think it's awesome, no wonder she plays with it all the time

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  23. Hi, remember me? I used to read you and comment all the time, and ever so often, I'd say something mildly amusing?

    No?

    Oh, well, I don't blame you.

    So, first, I need to say that you are extremely cruel to women with weak pelvic muscles who gave birth 9 days ago, because the man who came with the TV and couch, well, that made me piddle myself.

    Second, you're even meaner for making me use words like "piddle myself." What am I? A 90-year old grandmother now?

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  24. LOL... You are TOO FUNNY! Have you tried looking at the website for the toy to see if they have any better men available??? I might have to buy that for Pufferfish. Maybe it would even be something she and Little Bear could share!!!! Thanks for the Christmas gift idea!!!

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  25. Laura Harvey5:31 PM

    Whats everyone doing for safety precautions for Halloween? My husband came across an article (http://i-newswire.com/pr220892.html) with some info about background checking neighbors. I thought that may be a little overboard, but it had some other good suggestions for some precautions I haven't thought about. Last year my youngest son came down with a massive fever after Halloween. I almost thought about just taking the kids to our church's fall festival this year instead of door-to-door to prevent that from happening again. I don't know yet. What's your advice? Am I over-reacting or just being a concerned mom?

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  26. toilet dude needs some bowel buddies pronto!

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  27. I've been reading a while, but this dollhouse cracked me up so much I have to comment.. I want one! haha

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  28. I think they're off with the dwarves ... If that doesn't make for some hawt action, I don't know what does!

    PS - WHERE THE HELL IS THE POST ABOUT MY GIFT?

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  29. This is strange... I have two little boys and yet this is the SECOND time in a week that I have heard about this particular doll house. The first was on a podcast I listen to (Jumping Monkeys, about parenting in the digital age), and they interviewed the people that created Mrs. Goodbe. I think I'm being sent a message that I need to buy this dollhouse for a niece. I wish they had something comparable for boys... say a pirate ship that teaches good manners? Arrrrrrggggh... wash your hands me hearty!

    Here's the link to the podcast, in case you're interested:

    www.jumpingmonkeys.com scroll down to the 10/12 entry.

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  30. oh - I have never seen this dollhouse - she looks divine!! We just have the fisher price family one - which my girls adore - but that one - may have to be a xmas gift!!

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  31. The guy pooping for several days cracked me up!

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  32. Bwahahah! You are hysterical!

    And I love how you rectified the gender roles. Good for you!

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  33. the dwarfs were a hoot. I've never heard of Mrs Goodbee. Where have I been?? Glad she's having fun and finally got some dudes to get the important stuff done around the house. Hope she finds the little man soon.

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  34. Oh, now I'm just not sure which is more entertaining, the fish tank of horrors or Mrs. Goodbee's doll house!

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  35. I've never heard of Mrs. Goodbee. Of course, I've been living under a boy rock for the past 13 years, so I guess it's excusable.

    Wonder if my 11yo step-daughter would like this - I, er.. I mean we could have a lot of fun with a dollhouse, right??

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  36. Think I could get away with buying one of those for myself if I claimed I just want to be sure to have one if I ever have a granddaughter??

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