Wednesday, February 18

Matchy Matchy Happy Happy

Dear Target,

I'm about to ask you a favor, and I just want to make it clear that it PAINS me to ask it. PAINS ME. And kind of makes me want to puke. Sadly, though, I have been left with no choice.

You see, my dear daughter has decided that it's really fun for me and her to wear matching pajamas. There was a time when I very nearly fall to the ground laughing hysterically when I saw mothers and daughters wearing matching clothes, but I'm coming to realize that sometimes it's the kid's fault. I assure you, in this case it is definitely the kid's fault. Alexis gets ridiculously excited when she digs through her pajama drawer for a particular pair, then digs through my drawer for a matching pair. The smile on her face as she hands me my pajamas and says, "We match the same!" is enough for me to forget just how dumb grown woman look when they wear clothing that kids can wear.

In return for me voluntarily dressing in matching pajamas, I get a little gift from Alexis. She has dropped the whole thing where she would only wear wretched Disney Princess gowns. This. is. spectacular. Truly, it brings a joyful little tear to my eye to think of all those obnoxious Disney sluts sitting unloved in the back of the drawer. Definitely worth it.

So, here's the thing: Alexis needs to wear gowns at night. She can't do two-piece pajamas because just as the bottoms start to fit, the tops make her look like she's channeling Britney Spears in the bare belly days. I need to wear two-piece pajamas because me and gowns are not on speaking terms ever since that little incident with the bedpost. Alexis is OK with us wearing different types of pajamas, the fabrics just need to be matchy matchy.

Now, Target, you have made this little complication possible to overcome. The Nick & Nora pajamas are fantabulous, and I have managed to obtain three whole sets of Matchy Matchy Happy Happy Kid Pajamas. But, now that Alexis wants to match every. single. night we are experiencing a bit of an issue. We need more pajamas.

Sadly, you have exactly one set that will fit the bill right now. One is better than none, but that one? IS A UNICORN AND RAINBOW PRINT. *gag*

I can't do unicorns.

I can't do rainbows.

I DEFINITELY can't do them both at the same time.

So, will ya' please get some new Matchy Matchy Happy Happy Kid Pajamas in stock? I would be fine with sock monkeys, ducks, or even clouds. Anything but unicorns and rainbows. Just follow the above rules about gown vs. two-piece, and you can have my money.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

With much retail love,
The Lady Who Simply Can't be Caught Wearing Stuff She Liked When She Was Five

26 comments:

  1. Why don't you go fabric shopping, and get someone to make you some matchy-matchy? (I'd do it...PJ's are stupid simple to make!)

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  2. @Jenn--Be veeeeery careful what you offer.

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  3. Hee hee. Buy 2 nightgowns you like and have someone use one of them to make Alexis a match.

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  4. What? You haven't hit Karen, super sewing chick, up for awesome matchy acceptable jammies yet?
    WTH woman?

    Omg, I nearly hurt myself laughing at this.

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  5. Should have sent this to Target, not to us.
    I agree with Jenn, pj's are so easy to make.

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  6. "We match the same." Awww, man! For that, I might slip into the unicorns and rainbows (ewww). But, "we match the same"? I like that almost as much as "Dank you."

    Looks to me like there will be plenty of matchy matchy happy happy sans unicorns and rainbows in your future. Good!

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  7. I think you sh ould have Jenn make you some - she offered!

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  8. OMG. You must post a picture of you and Alexis 'matching the same'. PLEASE??? heehee

    It is crazy the stuff these little rugrats get us to do for them. We're such suckers!

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  9. I think you should get the ones with the feet. And, document it.

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  10. My word, where to begin. The bedpost incident? The two of you walking around in the house all matchy happy? And the mere thought of you in rainbows and unicorns has sent me over the edge. I'll chuckle all day. Thanks. :)

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  11. I want to hear about the incident with the bedpost........

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  12. If you time your laundry right, you could probably have just one day where at least one of those pajamas are not available. I got my son and husband both Batman jammies for Christmas. They aren't the same pattern, but matching nonetheless.

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  13. There will be no discussion of the bedpost incident. The end.

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  14. Pictures of matchy happy is a must, rainbows and unicorns...Yes, must have pictures. Thanks for the giggles. And you know we are making the bedpost incident much worse than it actually is..

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  15. *chants* Bedpost, bedpost, bedpost!
    We want bedpost!

    You are too funny!!
    My Grandma used to make my Mom and I matching PJ's. I would totally cave if 1. I had a girl and 2. she said,"We match the same."

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  16. I was thinking I could do rainbows and unicorns....but nope. I'm with you;)

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  17. I'm having a nightmarish imagining of the bedpost story. Yikes.

    LMAO at you in matching jammies while understanding.
    And I never want to hear another word when I lament the absence of Dora. Ha!

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  18. But...when you rub a unicorn's horn you get magic unicorn mayonnaise! At least that's what I learned from Robot Chicken. ;)

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  19. Me and Aurora had matching pj's when she was little. Now that she's a teenager it gets confusing on whose pj's are whose if we have the same ones.

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  20. Looks like she's following in your footsteps with that camera.

    Hope you get more Jammies. Target always pulls through, right?

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  21. I just admitted in my head how truly excited I am to have a little girl (and another on the way!) I would gladly give up sleeping sans clothing if it meant matching jammies with my girls. (Though I think we might be headed that way anyway, as Maren has, on more than one occasion, stripped buck naked and crawled into my bed.)

    What's the cost for therapy these days?

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  22. Too funny! My girls love to "Matchy Matchy" me, especially my six year old. It gets much more complicated with two girls, when sometimes, by pure accident, you match one and not the other. My 6 year old throws a fit "no one is wearing the same as me" and gets upset. Or will change her pj's to match ours. Certainly makes for some bedtime adventures!

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  23. All I can say is thank goodness my girls never wanted to be matchy matchy happy happy!

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  24. I can not agree with your assertion that Disney Princesses are sluts. I LOVE them! And I hope one day Elianna will love them too.
    I also love Target and will try to pull some strings.

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  25. @TTG--Oh, just you wait. You'll get your fill of the Princesses. ;-)

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  26. Nick and Nora rock the house!!! I love the sock monkeys!!!!

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