We are Raising the Next Picasso, Yo

One of Alexis' most favoritest things to do has always been to color, draw, and color some more. She loves crayons, she loves markers, she loves paint, and she loves what they can do to a piece of paper. When I stripped the house of all of her things in preparation for putting it up for sale, the one thing that was sacred was her art table. Hell hath no fury like a kid who can't find her favorite place to sit and play artist.

Recently Alexis has taken to drawing us pictures, folding the paper up into a tiny little rectangle, and then making a big production out of taking it to the popular parental unit of the moment. "Momma, look what I made for you!" she will gush. Both Mr. Husband and I gush back. It's our duty to be all, "Wow! That's really beautiful!" even though we have no idea what the hell we're looking at.

(Yes, Alexis, we fake enthusiasm for you. I'm thinking that by the time you are old enough to read this, you'll be old enough to understand that we are big fat liars who really do live to make you happy, so we're willing to act like that bunch of squiggles is fantabulous. But it's not. It's a bunch of squiggles. Still, you go girl!)

Most of the time we'll ask Alexis what exactly is depicted in the picture. 99 out of 100 times, we'll then think something along the lines of, "Yeah? I don't see it. At all." That's just to say that her artwork is a bit . . . abstract. Definitely abstract. She's three, so I would expect nothing else.

(BTW, Alexis, this thing where you got it in your head that you are supposed to color inside the lines freaks me out. You do NOT need to color inside the lines. Ever. Unless you want to. I mean that--only stay in those lines if it is what makes you happy, chica.)

Today Alexis sat with a determined little look on her face as she put markers to paper and created several masterpieces. She delivered dozens to me, and each time I feigned enthusiasm before tucking the artwork carefully into the trash can. (I know, I know. I'm horrible, but if I kept every single thing she draws, I would need a house the size of Texas. It's too much to even think about photographing it all and storing them electronically. The kid draws A LOT.)

There was one little picture she didn't deliver to me, though. I spotted it as I sat her dinner down on the table and instantly, I gasped. It actually looked like something. See?



I asked Alexis what it was, just in case it wasn't a fish with a mohawk. She said it was a robot. OMG! It actually does look like a robot! (Sort of. C'mon, people, she's THREE. Artistic interpretation can be a bit loosey goosey.) Right away I sought out Mr. Husband and showed it to him.

His reaction was a mirror-image of mine. He too nearly passed out from shock that it looked like the thing Alexis said it was. He instantly led Alexis to the kitchen to pick a place on the fridge for the artwork to hang. All together we reveled in celebration of a little sketch that was more than just squiggles. If anyone had walked in during the party, they would have thought the kid had found the cure for Cancer.

It wasn't until later that I realized we had screwed ourselves over. The parade, fireworks, and overall party atmosphere for the robot sketch might have been a wee bit overboard. What are we going to do when she creates some artwork that uses realistic colors? And perspective? We might have to figure out how to get Walt Disney World to declare it the Year of Alexis.

Anybody got Walt's phone number? I better start preparing now.