Sunday, January 10

Counting Down the Minutes Until this Month Ends

Apparently we should mark our calendars for the next fourteen years. We need to grab a fat red marker and write CHALLENGING across January. For four years running, January has been "challenging." And by "challenging," I mean OMG! This kid!

Alexis is, generally speaking, an easy to get along with kid. She's mostly good, complete with a side of sassy. The thing is, she likes to express all that is impossible about a particular age nonstop for about a month before she actually is that age. Every year has been the same.

Right before she turned one, she thought it would be GREAT FUN to carry out the whole One Year Olds are Insane Plan. All the new-found independence and lack of concern for safety that you expect of a one-year old was bottled up for Alexis, and she dumped that sucker out all. at. once. Walking through a parking lot with her was like trying to hold a spastic Frogger's hand as you drag him kicking and screaming to the safety of the log on the other side of the river. Only, Frogger doesn't want your help because he thinks he would look spectacular splattered on the front of that semi. Oh, and he plans to scream "PLEASE CALL CYS! I'M BEING ABUSED!" Just for fun.

A whole month. Impossible. And then, all of sudden, it stopped and the kid was almost human again. Sure, she still had her I'm Feeling One moments, but not that frequently.

Then there was the month before two. "Terrible" would be an understatement. Imagine a whole year's worth of terrible concentrated into one short month. THAT. THAT is what we survived. And then two itself was actually pretty damn fun.

Three was the same thing. Everybody who has been there will say that three is WAY worse than two, and that it is. When you concentrate all of its drama and whining and general buttheadery into one month? It's a miracle no lives were taken. Truly.

And now here we are on the cusp of four. I know that we just have to hang in there, be consistent, and scare the rotten out of her with lots of love. All the fun that four can bring is right there, just waiting for us. If we survive this month.

That's a big if.


  1. My son turns 4 in April, and I really, really hope by some miracle he magically snaps out of whatever funk 3 has had him in because oh my god, it's awful.

  2. If you get 11 months of coolness -- then I dig your kid even more!

  3. Really? Other children do this, too? Cause we have had a whole lotta two going on around here this month, and I am about at the end of my rope.

  4. @just jamie--I don't really know whether I would prefer ten minute chunks of pure evil or if the month of pure evil is better. It's quite a toss-up.

  5. Wow, good luck with that. You really didn't even need to write this post, because that picture? Says it all. She just looks like she is planning your destruction.

  6. I'd trade my 4 year olds in for the 3 year old OR 5 year old model any day. With Isaac and Gracie anyway. We'll see with Evie. I have a feeling 3 is going to throw me for a loop I'm not ready for.

    Oh, and the picture? Three kinds of AWESOME.

  7. Thank you for giving me hope that my previously sweet peppy two year old isn't now permanently an emotional basketcase. Because I've said "where did I go wrong, I broke her!" at least five hundred times in the last two weeks.

  8. I never thought I'd survive years three or four with either of my girls, but somehow I did. I have to say for me, four was the worst for both of my girls, especially my younger one. I hope that is not the case for you as I barely survived that year. Good luck!

  9. Anonymous8:45 PM

    I thought two would be the death of me. And then? THEN....three came along and smacked me in the face. It wasn't horrible and didn't have me ready to enter a witness relocation program, but Sweet HEEBUS! Three was far worse than two.

    She just turned four. So far, the nasty streak is still there when it wants to be. It's okay, though. She, like Alexis, is pretty freakin' cool the majority of the time so, I'll roll with it.

    And the picture? She's totally plotting how to take you down. ;)

  10. I know just what you mean. We get this for a few months before her birthday and half-year birthday. It's such a joy.

    Incidently, it's a known thing that some childhood development books and experts talk about being "regressions." It's that right around birthdays and half-year birthdays they are going to make a big developmental leap forward. But to make that leap, they first go through the regressions, which affects behavoir, sleep and a load of other things.

    We are in the thick of it now. And my girl's 3 year birthday isn't until March!

    p.s. We've got some Boo Berry cereal too. Yummy.

  11. Oooooh, that is a mighty, mighty stink eye she is giving you.... I'd be scared.

  12. In 4's defense, it is not a terrible year, especially after 3. Whining, foot-stomping, The Pout. It requires more patience than wrangling. IMO.

    Good luck. that is quite the look she is giving you in that picture. And, yep, that about sums up 4.

  13. Anonymous4:22 PM

    Oh sister . . . boy do I feel you right now! Maren just turned 3, and she is having the mother-of-all-months! I *may* have used the term 'butthead' in reporting to her father what she had done a few days ago. It is so hard watching them search for and exert their independence - especially when you know what a cool kid they really are inside. Here's hoping the month passes quickly!

  14. i considered 4 to be a continuing house of horrors. consider yourself lucky if you can get it all out of the way in a month.

  15. you give me hope that when my girl's 3rd birthday rolls around in a 3 1/2 weeks there is some chance that the sweet child I had up until the middle of December will return. Please?!?! We had streaks of difficulty in the fall, but for the past two weeks I think she has been crying 3 times as much as her 8 month old brother. 8-|