Wednesday, April 9

One of Those Dyson Posts

So.

I have started writing approximately three halfway decent posts only to discover that my snot-filled brain is incapable of stringing together coherent thoughts.

Hey, look, the Pens won!

Oh yeah, I was saying . . . something.

Um, yeah.

So I know I have been sucking harder than a Dyson as of late. It wasn't your imagination. I have sucky suck sucked about the writing lately.

And I'm going to suck again tonight.

I think it's vitally important that I break from this nearly coherent thought to report that the Bulldog has some wicked gas tonight. The kind of gas that will smack you in the head so hard you fall over and end up wishing you were dead just so you wouldn't have to smell.the.stench.

Ugh.

Anyway, I'm going to lock the beast with the poisonous butt in the basement and see if I can sleep off this sinus infection turned headache turned do I really have to breathe? Because ouch. Just ouch.

I will be back. It will be coherent. I will not whine.

Because I'm a really nice Dyson, I'll leave you with links to a few of my favorite old posts. Feel free to review them at your leisure.

There's the shopping one which is soon to be followed up with another similar post because the powers that be have done some things to that website that are just crying out for me to make fun of them. And every parent that buys that worthless crap.

There's also the beginning of the worm saga which is just so much fun.

I might as well bring up the fact that once upon a time I had too much time on my hands. In case you are losing sleep from wonderment, I stuck to my guns. I may have spent approximately eleventy seven fourteen dollars on Caramel Macchiatos almost every day all winter, but I didn't buy a single over-priced Pumpkin Spice Latte.

Finally, there's the origins of Helmet Head and the illustrations of how Helmet Head evolves.

Hey look! It's a cute picture of the kid with the Bulldog!

32 comments:

  1. Well gosh darn it! That IS a cute picture!

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  2. I love your suckiness!

    :)

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  3. Anonymous12:44 AM

    All that talk of sucking and I had to close the window in case Nathan thought I was looking at p0rn again.

    Get better soon.

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  4. Yeah, I'm with Jamie . . . suck away!

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  5. Hahaha! When in doubt throw up a picture of a cute dog. It works for me!

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  6. I agree with the others - your suckiness rocks!

    Hope you feel better soon. Email me your address and I'll send you a box of homemade cookies.

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  7. HAHAHAHA--the beast with the poisonous butt. Awww, poor Meg; I know the feeling. And the sucky-ness. Because whenever your head is filled with the snot of the dreaded sinus infection, EVERYTHING seems to be filled with sucky-ness. The good part for us is, your sucky-ness is extremely funny. And being like a Dyson SHOULD come in handy at some point :).

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  8. Oh, and have I mentioned lately that you have a mighty cute kid? Yup, it's true.

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  9. feel better soon-you have my sympathy!
    you sure do have a couple of cuties there.
    who drew the rainbow? very impressive-I love the clouds!
    Oh, and come see me about a pic for WW

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  10. OMG thank you for the old links. i never knew the origins of helmet head and am roaring!
    i also love the shopping one!
    oh, and is it just pumpkin spice or all latte's?

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  11. Hope you feel better soon, so you can get out and truly enjoy this great weather! Is Alexis better now?

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  12. Anonymous8:45 AM

    Please, my domestic partner. I would love to see you hoovering away with the Dyson. And, I loves you celeryishly enough to share my Allegra with you. Maybe I'll send you some with your sussy.

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  13. LOVE the rainbow...
    And yeah, your word illustration of sinus hell was beyond perfect! Yep. Way to describe my days, as of late, too! Way to hit the nail on the head... (Ha! I almost wrote "nose on the head", which could work. Have you tried it? Nothing else seems to help....)

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  14. Ugh. Sorry you are feeling so nasty. Hope you are better soon.
    Love the pic. They look like such good buddies. So cute!

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  15. I'm sorry your not feeling well, I'm sending healing vibes your way!

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  16. Anonymous9:45 AM

    Hope you feel better soon! Loved the links though. hysterical!

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  17. Hope you're feeling better soon!

    Does the bulldog eat chalk? Seems like something my 2 would at least like to taste.

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  18. Your suckiness is my best effort! I love your blogs. you make me crack up every day!

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  19. I'm simply satisfied with a picture of the bootiful Alexis and I-want-to-snuggle-and-kiss-her-wrinkly-face bulldog!

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  20. Hope ya feel better soon!!!

    And yay about the pens winning, eh? so exciting! I'm wearing my pens shirt right now actually!!

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  21. Feel better soon! Suddenly I'm craving Starbucks...

    Love the sidewalk chalk :)

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  22. Your suckiness is me on a good day lately...

    Feel better soon.

    That kid of yours makes me smile everytime. :)

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  23. Is bulldog gas worse than human man ass gas?

    And what the hell do you mean you DON'T want to see me shave my heels?

    What gives?

    Hallie

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  24. Our cat has bouts of really bad gas or so my husband claims ;)

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  25. I'm sorry...did you just say something...I can't see past the cute kid and the rainbow sniffing dog!! HA! Adorable!

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  26. Look at you with your ever changing blog look! How cool. Sorry you are not feeling well, I've had that same cold. It lasts a while. So stock up on whatever goodness you can to get yourself through it. Hope you feel better soon!

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  27. wow! look at all these people that bought into your "sinus headache" (do you see me doing the finger quotes?). Man, have you got them snowed! I know you are riding your high from meeting a certain Top Momma and her cutie boy!

    And yes, we're having fun over here again and it's not even Friday and no wine is involved. However, copius amounts of cold medicine are.... That's what I get for making out with Justin, who made out with Mr. Canon, who made out with you.

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  28. "illustrations" is crackin' me up so I'm giving you that award. Don't know if you use awards around here or not, but you can come over and admire it, if nothing else because you deserve to have one, especially when you're sick. Those graphic illustrations you made are just too much!!

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  29. hehehe...dog farts are funny.

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  30. I am lovin' that picture immensely. It's frame-worthy.

    I'm assuming you're over the cold by now, and if it makes you feel better I had no idea you were congested when we chatted. Me? I sound like Rudolph wearing the fake nose.

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