Thursday, May 29

I Wish this Were a Paid Post

Dear Makers of Those Things I Lurve but that Cost More than a Gallon of Gas,

Hiya! Let me just start by saying I don't do paid posts. Nope. No way. In fact, they make me cRaZy. Won't do them.

But.

I think y'all are geniuses. Mind-reading geniuses. Mind-reading geniuses who crawled into my brain (scary place that it is) and figured out EXACTLY what it was that I so desperately needed last summer. You watched how I lurved seeing the Toddler enjoy popsicles. You heard my brain noise about how I was going to blow a gasket if she didn't eat the dang things faster. You saw the fireworks when she dripped popsicle juice all over every freakin' thing in the tri-state area.

And you solved my problem.

That mini thing? GEEEEENIUS! I mean, people, those things are EXACTLY toddler-sized! I know you knew that, but WOOOOHOOOO! I can give the kid a Popsicle and she will actually finish it in under 15 minutes! There's still a little drippy drippy going on, but I can live with a little drippy drippy as long as it doesn't lead to sticky sticky all over my floory floory.

So, thank you SO MUCH for creating the perfect solution for one of my many little problems!

But.

WTH? Over $4.00? For some juice on a stick? Are you serious? I know you know I'm going to buy them anyway. $4.00 is a small price to pay for a little bit of sanity. But. I'm going to moan and groan each time the kid downs five of those little buggers in one day (and she will--they are tiny enough for me to shove a whole one up my left nostril and still have space to breath). I'm going to whine that I could have driven to, um, a block or two with the gas I could have bought with that money. I will never let the world forget how ticked off I am that I am a slave to the over-priced Popsicles.

So. How about you send me some coupons? $1 off would be nice. Even $2 off. Heck, why not go all cRaZy and send some coupons for FREE Popsicles? If you do, I will say your name over and over and over and over and I'll tell all my friends to buy them and I'll rave about how fantastic miniature popsicles are for slower-than-molasses toddlers.

Pony up some coupons. C'mon, you know you want to.

As an added bonus, I'll do a much better job of capturing the Toddler singing your praises. I might even bust out the semi-decent and hardly ever used camcorder. Maybe some lights. I might even throw in some hair and makeup.

Love,
The Lady Who is Devoted to You, but Would Like to Save a Buck or Two

P.S.
It just occurred to me that you won't know I'm talking about you if I don't say who you are, Popsicle Mighty Magic Minis. So, Popsicle Mighty Magic Minis, did you know that I love you, Popsicle Mighty Magic Minis? Well, Popsicle Mighty Magic Minis, I do love you. However, Popsicle Mighty Magic Minis, you are too expensive. Work on that, will you, Popsicle Mighty Magic Minis? SEND COUPONS TO ME. ME, ME, ME. Please and thank you.

P.P.S.
I know I could make mini popsicles myself. In fact, I did last year. BE YE NOT SO STUPID! It was totally not worth all the effort. Or, maybe it's just me that ends up with a freezer full of assorted juices that are permanently frozen in place because the stupid Popsicle mold thingy got knocked over before it all froze into a solid sheet of red and blue and purple and green flavored ice. Speaking of which, I wonder what would happen if I were to defrost the freezer? Biggest sticky puddle ever? Better not chance it.

P.P.P.S.
I may be typing in run-on sentences because I may or may not have eaten about a dozen over-priced miniature Popsicles (Did ya' know that was a brand name and not the name of the stuff? You know, like Kleenex? I didn't either, but I do now!) and I may or may not currently be suffering from a sugar high. Woo-eeeee! So, how about some coupons? Go team Blue Popsicle! Coupons. Me. Me. Coupons.

42 comments:

  1. My mom bought some of those last year. She had mini bomb pops or crayon ones or something like that. Anyway, would you believe my goofy kids won't eat them. At least that will save me some money. I like them, though, and I'm not sure I'll ever be able to eat one again without thinking of one shoved up your nostril. Thanks so much for that image!

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  2. suddenly i have a craving for a popsicle.

    where did THAT come from????

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  3. The problem I have with those lovlies is that I have a daughter that lives in excess when it comes to anything frozen on a stick. Fudge bars, juice bars, Scribblers, mini Popsicles...if its in our freezer, she'll eat them til her lips are blue and her shirt looks like a rainbow of stickiness.

    That said, I'm still with you. I'll gladly fork over four dollars plus just for a few minutes of sanity.

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  4. hee hee - too funny. I didn't even know there was mini frozen goodness. Now I know!

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  5. We buy those and Emily loves them, but since they are small, she wants 17 of them at a time. Also, she hates the orange ones, so I always have a freezer full of sad, orange popsicles.

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  6. Anonymous8:02 AM

    I've always wanted to eat a bicycle. Yum Yum. And, hello?! Get a Drip Stix. Silly Silly Billiest of Burghs.

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  7. So funny! Hope you can get some coupons.
    I love that she is eating a 'bicycle'. And she didn't seem to be eating that thing slower-than-molasses. She could barely talk she was shoving it in her face so fast! HAHAHA!

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  8. first word out of frass's mouth each am i pop....she is obsessed. i didn't know about these minis till the other day at sass's preschool they had a field day and passed these suckers out. i was in AWE !!!

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  9. I have never seen the "mini" pops. Of course, I rarely buy this kind of stuff because my toddler will eat them all. In. One. Sitting. Seriously. And she really does not need more junk in her diet. You know how horrible of an eater she is.

    When I do buy the stuff though, I buy the big Flavorice stuff from WalMart. Cheaper and no drips.

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  10. LOL! Step away from the popsicles....slowly!!!

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  11. $4 for popsicles? Actually, I think I paid that much for the last ones I bought, but they were full sized ones. But still, why am I paying good money for what is essentially frozen juice? Hmmmm....

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  12. Get that kid in show business! I have really great popsicle makers and I think I bought them at your favorite store, but I'm not sure if they still sell them. They stay flat, and come out easily. If you get sent coupons for popsicles from this, could you send out a few requests for me...for a few bigger items, like a washer/dryer, or flat screen tv?

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  13. This was AWESOME. I love how Toddler says, "ummm good" at the end. Believe it or not, wher I live (aka, BFE) they don't sell these yet. Perhaps in the next six to ten years they will grace our grocery store shelf. But maybe not. Our city is so cheap.

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  14. Anonymous9:16 AM

    I didn't know they came in minis. They made popcicles at daycare with blended watermelon and OJ and my kid wouldn't touch it -- at first. Once he finally got a taste they said he finished in about 2 minutes. :-)

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  15. Yes. I know about these little boogers. Beans nana got them last year. Along w/ mini ice cream bars.
    BAD NANA!
    Okay Alexis is ADORABLE! I love how she said it is, "SO GOOD" and "bicycle". SUPER CUTE!

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  16. So good!

    I buy the box of pop ice - the plastic tubes of liquid that I put in the freezer. They come in boxes of 100. Because they're in plastic tubes, THEY DON'T DRIP. Love them.
    http://www.jelsert.com/products_popice.asp

    Of course my husband gets frustrated when he finds the plastic tubes all over the yard ...

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  17. Aidan loves those, I love them! If you get some coupons wanna share? ;o)

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  18. Um, I don't think they sell these up here yet.

    BUT I so agree with WHAT a HECK of a mess we make when we try and make our own. I'm with you I'll pay the extra buck for sanity.

    Hell, I'll pay ANY amount for a little more sanity.

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  19. Anonymous10:49 AM

    Little Man regularly asks for popicles for breakfast. Because that's his idea of a complete breakfast with powdered donuts.

    When we first got him on popsicles, he was only allowed to eat the orange ones, because purple is Sweetie Pie's favorite and pink are mine. And the orange would always get left over before Little Man came along. Unfortunately, within two days he was on to us and began demanding part of our purple and pink stash.

    I wish Popsicle would just sell one flavor rather than the mix. Since you're so tight with them now, can you make that request for me?

    Also were the dogs locked up somewhere else during this incident, because popsicles in my house usually involve the two dogs circling like sharks around the toddler.

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  20. Now I want a popsicle, and it is only 50 degrees here!

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  21. Why is it that when they make things smaller (ie, more convenient) they charge extra for it? And they think we're stoopid enough to fall for it?

    I guess because we are.

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  22. I support your non-homemade thesis. I'm all about outsourcing - and mini-popsicles are definitely an area of outsourcing as far as I'm concerned. It's the cost of doing business, damnit.

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  23. I am dyin' over here. That was too funny.
    Sugar high much honey?
    Love the vid, too.

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  24. Anonymous12:19 PM

    She is way too cute! mmmmmmmmmm they so good! lol...Enjoy!

    PS Popsicles were an outside only treat when my kids were toddlers. I think that makes me a mean mom?

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  25. I can't imagine why your husband thinks you a little strange!! Hehehe!

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  26. Whoa, I think I got some of your sugar high just READING that! I hate freezing my own popsicles, too. The tipping-over-before-frozen incident has happened way too many times to make it worth it.

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  27. Anonymous3:21 PM

    I have a little man of 42 who loves popcicles as much as your little one. I swear. I even wrote a post about it: http://luluslaundryblog.com/2007/08/07/its-man-of-popsicle-to-save-the-day/

    My little, little man. Perhaps I'll buy him some of those new fangled ones. You know, to keep them from dripping on his shirt and all.

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  28. gosh I could eat her up she's so fweet with her "so good"s

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  29. I'm always blending up smoothies--the popsicles melt way too fast here :)

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  30. I love, love, love........the mighty magic minis! Thank you for reminding me to put them on my grocery list :)

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  31. in my home...popsicle = frozen, diluted juice. I'm too cheap to buy the "real stuff"

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  32. You should only eat popsicles outside. That could be a rule.

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  33. Anonymous8:17 PM

    Mmm popsicles. We rarely have them in the house because SOMEONE likes to eat them for breakfast. Oh, and my daughter likes them too.

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  34. "mmmmm! they SO GOOD!"

    I think I counted you asking her "what do you think?", "do you like it?", "how good is it?" like 12 times before she just spit it out on her own.

    and we like those here, too, until Gavin discovered the much larger Freeze Pops or the smoother and tastier Italian Ice Pops. And WAY cheaper and a little less drippy-drippy-sticky-sticky. And I know, since that nearly 4-year old of mine takes 1 hour for dinner he LIKES!

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  35. Why do I suddenly want to take up a collection and send cases of popsicles to a stranger??? in pittsburg????

    oh, yeah. Hello.. You fool! I love you!


    laughing laughing laughing!! it's past my bedtime!

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  36. ROFL - that very last bit "They're so good!" OMG - I'm dying. That is priceless. They should contact you for tv commercials!! :)

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  37. Did you get a coupon yet?

    haha!

    Have I told you that I think you write the most creative posts?

    okay...can't comment now, gotta go make some hearts for my daughter before she stabs me with her tooth pick...

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  38. I like anything that comes in mini size.

    ps what's a paid post

    pps go take a couple laps around the neighborhood wouldja!?!

    ppps I wrote a letter to KRAFT. :) Maybe I should blog about that next week...maybe just for you.

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  39. Anonymous8:06 PM

    "Mmmmmmmmmmmthey're so good!"

    Gobble. her. up. I. will.

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  40. Anonymous6:06 PM

    Here's a trick. Write a really nice, hand-written note singing the praises of whatever product you really like. Add a photo of you or your shorty using whatever it is. Mention that you're a blogger. Send it to the company. Whenever you send them any sort of note, they usually send you some sort of coupons. If you really kiss their butt, maybe they'll send you BETTER than coupons! I once heard of someone who wrote to an ice cream company saying how much they liked the ice cream, and the company sent them a lifetime supply!
    True story, or urban legend? I do not know. But its worth a try!

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  41. This place has huge ice pops in t tube thing. http://local.times-news.com/Hershey+Creamery+Co+--26+Ice+Cream.327671.5175916.home.html Like half a pound each. They are $12 for a case of 48, but the Little league sells them at the concession stand for $1 each.

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  42. See what a popsicle will do to you? You're talking in run on sentences, just like me. And you don't even have 5 kids yet. Watch out!

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