Saturday, July 19

Using a Peacock as a Dangerous Weapon

For the past two weeks, it has been a daily ritual for the Toddler to try to con us into taking her to the Zoo. I do believe she would be perfectly content LIVING there, and she has tried every trick in her book to get us to go as often as possible. We've had her slip the sentence, "We go eat French fries AFTER we go to the Zoo," in just to see if we would notice that she was scheduling our day. She has tried convincing the dogs that they want to go to the Zoo in hopes that her little army could join forces and convince the adults in the house to load up the car and take the critters to see some critters. She has tried yelling, "PLEASE!" in a tone of voice that would be better suited for telling a prisoner to stop scaling the prison wall. Today was finally her lucky day (BTW, she's been there four times so far this year. Don't let her try to convince you she's deprived.)

It was a PERFECT day for the Zoo in that it was probably 90 degrees outside. There is no sarcasm to be found in that sentence; hot weather drives away the weak. It rocked to be there when it wasn't terribly busy. It also helped that we went later in the afternoon when the animals are far more active. We actually heard one kid gleefully scream, "LOOOOOOK! The Snow Leopard IS alive! It's actually moving!" The kid had a point there. The Snow Leopard is the first animal you see when you go in and it's ALWAYS sleeping. Except at 3:00 when it starts pacing and hanging out right next to the glass as it waits for it's meal.

Also pacing and hanging out right next to the glass were the tigers.



(I left the kid's head in this photo on purpose so you could see that the tiger really was inches away from us. SOOO Cool!)



While it was fun to see the tigers up REALLY close and to actually see them playing, it was the baby elephant that stole the show. This is Angelina and the other female elephants at the Pittsburgh Zoo. Angelina was born July 10th and I believe is Jackson's 7th kid.




(I don't know why I giggle at these photos of the headless Zookeeper, but I do. Pretend that's not weird, mmkay?)






Apparently it was the day for seeing animals up close through glass, because while we were hanging out in the monkey house, this guy came up for a visit:



And that is when I was reminded that my daughter is a wuss. A BIG wuss. The wussiest wuss that ever did wuss. Mr. Husband was holding her and thought he would be a kind, caring parent and show his animal-loving daughter the monkey-type thing up close.

She flipped out.

She yelled at him to, "Back up, Daddy!" over and over until he finally did. But the wuss didn't end there. Oh, no it didn't. After the monkey house we ventured to the little eating area for our customary fresh cut French fries fix. As we were sitting there fighting over the crispy ones, a peacock wandered into the area.

(Now, I would have some seriously incredible photos of that peacock if it weren't for one little thing: I am The Queen of Forgetting to Pack the Extra Camera Battery. I'm expecting my crown in the mail any day now because that is the THIRD time I've left for the Zoo with a nearly dead battery and no back-up. Don't you wish you were as talented as me?)

Anyway, we were happily eating French fries when the peacock wandered into the area. And headed straight for us. Right when the peacock moved close enough for Alexis to kick him, she noticed him.

And freaked the f*@& out. That? Is an understatement--there is no adjective that would accurately describe the level of freak that went on. Think about how badly you would freak out if Michael Jackson were to walk up to you, lick your face, then pull his nose off and shove it in your mouth. Now double it. She freaked out MORE than that. I picked the Toddler up to calm her down and then we all enjoyed twenty more minutes of trying to eat French fries and ice cream while the kid flipped her lid because a silly bird was in the same time zone as her.

The kid is scared of the peacock. A lot scared.

Mr. Husband, being the outstanding guy that he is, loves to exploit weaknesses. For example, he knows I hate to be called a common nickname derived from my first name. HATE IT. WILL STAB YOU IN THE FACE WITH A PITCHFORK FOR SAYING IT. So what does he do when he wants to irritate me? Calls me that name over and over and over and over. What did he do once he found out Alexis was scared of a very friendly (and GORGEOUS) peacock? He kept saying, "Look! There's the peacock!" and singing a lovely rendition of, "The Peacock is Coming to Take You Away." The Toddler was not amused.

This story brought to you by those who would like everyone to remember that I am not in fact the mean one in this house. Although, I do totally plan to yell, "Hey look, a peacock!" the next time Alexis tries to steal ice cream from me.







34 comments:

  1. Peacock peacock peacock!!

    Ha! I can hear her screaming 3 time zones away!

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  2. Okay, I love the pic where the zookeeper's head just randomly turns into a baby elephant. Also, I love baby elephants. They are like crack to me. PS. thank you for being one of the users of blogger that does not use that goddamn captcha feature. That thing is so annoying.

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  3. actually, i'd kinda be afraid of a peacock that was in kicking distance. i think they're mean, aren't they?

    or am i thinking of camels?

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  4. Dang it! I'll have to re-visit when I'm home. Can't see the pictures here at work.

    Let husband man know that these types of things will come back and bite him in the butt big time. My Hunny used to do things like that. Till they began haunting him. He'll regret it.

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  5. She must be getting her thrills from the zoo. It's like a freak show to her - go see the weird things behind the glass but - MERCIFUL HEAVENS!!!! - the thing is on the loose! Get it away from me!!!

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  6. I really need to get to the zoo this summer. You got some great photos.

    Hey if Alexis thinks peacocks are scary now, wait until she hears them screaming at night. I have a neighbor that has two and when I first moved here, I nearly crapped myself when I heard them. They are so creepy sounding, like a baby crying/screaming in pain. I finally got used to them. Either that, or the peacocks died, or the neighbors moved away :o)

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  7. I'd be afraid of peacocks too - especially within kicking distance. The other day I was totally freaking out because there were ducks and seagulls surrounding us while we ate in the city. Freaking. out.
    Great photos - I wish our zoo had more glass viewing areas.

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  8. We are going to the zoo soon, but man, I hope it is not as hot as it was yesterday! I am one of the weak, thank you. Passing out at the bear hill does not sound enjoyable to me.

    Alexis looked adorable! I love the zoo because you can get such great shots.

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  9. Sounds like fun! I dig the zoo less and less every year. I guess it is things like the high tension wires behind the gorillas that do it.

    Peacock!

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  10. Gorillas are a Must.

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  11. Peacocks are mean, man! I think Alexis has the right idea. I've been chased - YES CHASED - by peacocks before. Even if they look hawt.

    Though - of course - if a mean peacock were to show me its tail feathers? I'd just moon it with my massive arse. Hawt!

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  12. How fun is the zoo!?! I love the baby elephant...so cute! Would you believe my Mom raises peacocks?

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  13. See . . . that is what I LOVE about you! I would SO use the peacock thing if it meant more ice cream for me! A Mom's got to do what a Mom's got to do!

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  14. Oh heck yes, those peacocks are mean! They are such a big feature at our zoo, you can buy peacock stuffed animals and hand blown glass peacocks. They will grab food right from your plate if you let them get close. However, seagulls are MUCH worse.

    The heat does nothing to get rid of crowds here. I was crying the whole time we were out shopping today, about how funky hot it is and it was the busiest AND hottest day we've had here so far this summer. It's the rain that scares people here. Afraid of melting I guess.

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  15. The elephants at the zoo are always my favorite: but that baby elephant. OH.My.GOODNESS! I would have just wanted to stay there all day!

    :)
    I love the ways she slips in "we go....AFTER we go to the zoo."
    Love it.

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  16. Wow, that's one stunning zoo!

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  17. Alexis looks so much like her daddy. :)

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  18. We took the kids to the zoo today. Your zoo is a lot nicer then ours though. :o(

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  19. Yeah. Mr. Burgh Baby, (or, more accurately,Mr. Baby), needs to have an attitude adjustment. Tell him he needs to rise above his level of development and be BIGGER THAN THE TODDLER.
    BAHAHAHA Good luck!

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  20. Am I supposed to comment that the gorilla picture just above Mr. Husband looks a bit like him?

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  21. I couldn't help but laugh at the headless zoo keeper, sorry! Kids are so funny, the things that freak them out.

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  22. So...does she still want to go to the zoo or is she still having peacock nightmares?

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  23. She started back in with the Zoo requests first thing this morning. *sigh*

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  24. that baby elephant is adorable! and the rest of your zoo rocks...no wonder Alexis wants to be there all the time!!! the National Zoo sucks...if they'd only charge a nominal admission they'd have enough to feed AND house the animals without killing them. *sigh*

    so is it Mitchy or Shelly? >=) (those were the ones we called my cousin when we wanted to tick her off)

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  25. A Season ticket has to be the way to go. Either that or join forces with other mums of zoo loving kids and take turns to ship themoff to the zoo in the care of one part, thus leaving you with peaceful me time.
    At least you don't take spare (dead) batteries. Y does that all the time and drives me up the wall with his complaining about it!

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  26. Haha, the zoo keeper-elephant shots crack me up!! Lots of great pics. My kiddo is almost fearless, except a few weeks ago when she suddenly developed a paralyzing fear of a stuffed frog one day, which morphed into a fear of everything...like grass. Yes, grass. Thankfully it only lasted one day and then back to normal.

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  27. Awesome pics! Love the baby elephant!! SO CUTE!

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  28. BRUHAHAHAHAHA! I see NOTHING wrong with using the peacock to your advatage.

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  29. That "headless" zoo keeper shot is totally cool!

    Next time we go to the zoo we'll be sure to watch out for the peacocks. AHHH! ; )

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  30. Oh we would totally use the peacock thing. If she was doing something she wasn't supposed to we would say "you better stop or the peacock will get you" - that is better than santa for controlling behavior! (Kidding. I think.)

    And if that nickname is the one I am thinking of, I am totally with you. My husband learned early that there is no kidding around about that. I give him my evil look and he stops for fear he will never get to have sex again. HATE IT.

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  31. We are very glad you enjoyed your visit to the Pittsburgh Zoo and we enjoyed reading about your experience. Would you consider putting a link to the Pittsburgh Zoo on your website? It would help us with our SEO marketing and your readers will get a glimpse at some really cute videos taken at the zoo and other information pertaining to your blog. If you are interested in linking our website, please send me an email and I’ll make sure you link to the proper page. Thanks in advance for your consideration of this request.

    mkintern@pittsburghzoo.org

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  32. I love the zoo and I'm hoping my little one asks to go ALL THE TIME. Cause I would probably do it. Call in sick to work and take her on a whim. Every day. But I'm like a 5 year old, so you have to take that into account.

    Love that baby elephant!!!! While our zoo isn't perfect, I disagree with Colleen. It doesn't suck. Although charging a fee might be a good idea. Government funding can go only so far...

    Love those pics!

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  33. Too funny! I went to the Pittsburgh Zoo for the first time last weekend.

    I was a little startled to see a peacock just walking around...I was like, "Did you escape?"

    But then again, I'm much taller than a peacock! I'd be terrified of it, too, if I was a toddler.

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  34. Oh, I am totally with Alexis there. First of all you know full well that women don't like to have thunder stealers around, and peacocks are mean, pissy little thing. I'm with The Toddler on this.

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