Tuesday, November 24

Leggo My Eggo or I Will Mow You Down

When news of a nationwide Eggo waffle shortage made the front page of Yahoo news, lots of people started in with jokes.

Not me.

This waffle shortage thing is very serious business.

VERY SERIOUS BUSINESS.

For as long as she has had teeth, Alexis has been eating frozen waffles for breakfast. Every. single. day. Not having waffles in our house is like not having oxygen. YOU JUST DON'T DO IT.

Over the years, I have experimented with replacing her preferred Eggo waffles with other brands. It has not gone well. When I tried the organic ones with Elmo's face on the box, Alexis spit them out and declared them, "Yucky."

"But they have Elmo on the box!" I told her. Obviously, if the fuzzy red monster endorses something, children everywhere should clamor to have it.

"Yucky," she replied.

"But . . . Elmo!" I insisted.

Alexis was only one year old at the time, but she responded to my "ELMO!" declarations with a giant eyeroll.

When I found another brand on sale, I tried being sneaky. When Alexis wasn't looking, I shoved the impostor waffles into an empty Eggo box. She knew the difference. Immediately. She refused to eat them.

I've tried homemade. They weren't good enough. I was forced to eat them all myself.

The kid takes the whole "Leggo my Eggo" thing very, very, very seriously.

So, Little Old Lady at Giant Eagle, I am very sorry that I nearly knocked you on your behind grabbing the last box of Eggos. I didn't mean you any harm. Really. I just like to keep my kid happy so that she won't yell at me at 6:00 in the morning. Besides, I did you a favor. Flooding isn't why there are no Eggos to be had, Listeria is.

You're welcome.

20 comments:

  1. Anonymous6:49 AM

    If you find yourself in a bind, I have a few full size Buttermilk waffles (at least one box, I think) in my freezer. My kiddo like the mini waffles which I haven't even seen on the shelf for months.

    Lately though, he's been on a mini pancake kick so I've been lucky. He will also eat my homemade waffles so I'm good there. :)

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  2. it says they will ship them to locations based on "historic sales" You should be safe since you buy so many!

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  3. Wow, I didn't know people would still say in public that they eat Eggo waffles after the beating I took for my breakfast choices last week! Thanks though, I knew I couldn't have been the only one eating the things (or feeding them to a minor)!

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  4. I live in a hole. I didn't even know there was an Eggo shortage. But I'm glad to see you didn't have to whoop ass on an old lady. :)

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  5. I remember a post you wrote years ago about your husband going out late at night (or early in the morning?) just because she was having a fit about needing Eggo waffles. We all have our thing. My mom would only buy Herrs pretzels. Dylan eats the "yucky" organic Elmo waffles. I think he just likes the small size and he feels like he's actually getting four, instead of one.

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  6. My two bottomless pits eat oatmeal every morning... FOLLOWED by an Eggo. And as of tomorrow... we're out.

    Fail fail fail.

    They also won't eat other brands.

    Fail fail fail.

    They'll just have to survive with, you know, one breakfast.

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  7. We are having the same issue at our house. My kid eats one EVERY day. And they don't have the french toast flavor he likes anywhere and haven't in so long. Every day he asks. Every day I offer him a generic brand and he flips. It's been soo fun.

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  8. It so good to know that I'm not alone in this crisis. I'm totally serious.

    The kid has very few vices that we cave to, but Eggos are definitely one.

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  9. Thank you! You now gave me reason to feel blessed my child will not eat anythign with a "bready" consistency.

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  10. stateofmain10:34 AM

    I finished the last package of my Sam's Club-size (60 waffles) the DAY they announced the shortage. I don't have any kidlets, I just love them myself. I eat them (completely naked, no butter or syrup) every morning with an Instant Breakfast.

    I completely understand Alexis' need for them. And I feel for you, should the shortage become a true problem.

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  11. If necessary, generic chocolate chip waffles may be acceptable. :-)

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  12. We eat the Earth's Best kind with Elmo and Cookie Monster, only because they work my youngest's allergies. But, nothing beats an Eggo - your daughter has very discerning tastes. She knows what she likes. Smart girl. They are so much better than that others!

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  13. you shouldn't have written this. now *i* want eggo frikken waffles, which means i'll be out there, buying up your supply. WAIT! i am not as picky...i'll buy the ones in the plastic bag that are generic.

    maybe...

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  14. You are not alone! My boys are Eggo snobs! The shortage is taking it's toll on our family's well being.

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  15. Anonymous1:52 PM

    My kiddos have a real fondness for Eggo as well, though they don't seem to mind when I substitute the alternative (which is probably only because I removed them all from the box when I load up the freezer each week, and tell them that it is all the same.)

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  16. Huh. Listeria. Um...you can have the six boxes I have in the freezer?

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  17. One of the Super Walmarts in erie which we've dubbed "ghetto mart" (due to its location) has about 30 boxes of eggos. I picked up a couple the other day! Good thing Alex is still young enough that he just shoves whatever I put onto his tray of his highchair, regardless of what brand it is.

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  18. When I could still eat wheat, Eggo Waffles were my breakfast of choice, too. Now I eat Van's gluten free, and while they are not Eggo, I can eat them. I understand the difference.

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  19. Peanut eats other things for breakfast but she loves Eggo's, too. I noticed the signs at our grocery store the last few times I went there were signs on the freezer doors about the shortage and I didn't know why. Mid 2010! We could be in trouble in this house, too. Thank goodness she'll eat pancakes.

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  20. OMG, I love her white coat! So cute! And I just want to clarify her - you don't feed her the Eggo waffles FROZEN, do you? Like, you do put them in the toaster, right? Although... frozen would be great for a child who is teething! Yes... we love Eggo Waffles in our house too! No other brand will do!

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