Friday, December 14

I'm Trying Not to Laugh, Really I Am

Mr. Husband: "How are your eyes?"

Me: "Why?"

Mr. Husband: "I have pinkeye."

Me: "Nice."

Mr. Husband: "I think I had it yesterday, too. At least I'm not contagious anymore."

Me: "Yes you are."

Mr. Husband: "No, it's been 24 hours."

Me: "You're contagious until you've taken antibiotics for 24 hours."

Mr. Husband: "Oh. What should I do?"

Me: "Go to the doctor."

Mr. Husband: "I don't go to the doctor."

Me: "You do now."

Mr. Husband: "What do I do?"

Me: "You call the doctor and tell them you need to come in because you think you have pinkeye."

Mr. Husband: "How do I do that?"

Me: Pause. Think to self, "You pick up that thing called a phone and push the little itty bitty numbers in the correct sequence and voila! you talk into one end and listen with the other. It's magical."

"I'll email you the phone number."

Mr. Husband: "I'm not going to the doctor. I have a phobia."

Me: "You're going to the doctor. Pinkeye doesn't go away on its own."

I don't think I have to tell you how crazy this conversation made me. Fortunately, the man realized that I might just be right (big shock there) and managed to go to the Doctor's office. How he made it all the way there all by his lonesome self, I really don't know. Poor guy still needs mothered from time to time.

20 comments:

  1. Anonymous11:35 PM

    I'm seriously laughing over here. It's what I needed after a long night of cleaning! LOL

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  2. Ha!

    You should've thrown him a congratulatory party.

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  3. Oh I can sooo relate to this! The Coach won't go unless I drag his dying butt there. He's very much of the mindset "if I ignore it, it WILL go away"... silly man.

    I think its the testosterone. It blocks the common sense pathways.

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  4. I sometimes refer to my hubby as my child....I feel like his mom so often. How do they go to work and function without us? My husband thinks he can 'sleep off' any illness--like it is a hangover!

    Hope you don't end up with pink eye...or Alexis! Drops in a toddler's eyes - not fun!

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  5. Oh, my goodness, that's hysterical. "It's been 24 hours" just cracked me up, and with no meds! Here's hoping that it doesn't spread. We usually pass that around for a month before it finally goes away. And here's something else I learned: dogs can get and transfer this as well. Been there.

    Hey, I posted some tips about my Dyson in the comments at my blog if you're interested.

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  6. Good thing you were there to assist the poor lost, helpless man. Like Pam said, I often wonder how my husband functions at work! I am always saying "What did you do before I came along?" At least we know we are needed - very needed.

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  7. Anonymous8:45 AM

    Thanks. I am glad that I can can be your inspiration on a Friday night.

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  8. Aren't they the world's biggest babies? I don't need a second child. The BIG baby is much more difficult than the little one, no?

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  9. Yep. You don't have one child, you have two. He's just cheaper to hire a babysitter for...

    I myself gave birth to three children and married the fourth.

    We. are. insane.

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  10. My husband's back has been bothering him for WEEKS and he complains about it nonstop. I keep telling him to go to the doctor but he won't. I feel like screaming, "Well, if you won't go to the doctor then stop complaining about it all the time. Either do something about it or BE QUIET!!"

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  11. Hi. Found your site from AFF. That is so funny.....I almost spit my drink everywhere! :) :)

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  12. they all need to be mothered. it's amazing how their inner infant comes out, the minute they are sick! so funny, that post of yours!!!
    have a great weekend!

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  13. Daddy--Wow! I now have evidence that you really do read this blog. Fantabulous!

    Madame Queen--AMEN! I fuss at him all the time to either knock off the whining or go to the doctor. I don't even care which one.

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  14. My husband hates going to the doctor too! What is it about men and doctors, do they think that they are weak if they admit they need a doctor? Totally baffles me.

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  15. Men, I've got one to...can't make sense of 'em;)

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  16. That sounds like my spouse.

    'Please, can you ring for me?'

    I swear, the man is hopeless!

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  17. Karen--You are a genius and solved the mystery of how he got it in the first place. Back before Thanksgiving, a certain Bulldog was suffering from red, runny, crusty eyes. We assumed allergies, since that's par for the course with her once in a while.

    My husband totally contracted pinkeye from his dog.

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  18. That was really funny! I thought only kids do that, I never knew adults do it too! cute though...LOL

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  19. phew! I'm glad I'm not the only one who married a toddler!

    Mine has year-round allergies and keeps forgetting that HIS insurance makes him do it mail-in or else they make us pay BIG BUCKS at the regular pharmacy. What does he do? Goes to the regular pharmacy and complains about the price. I remind him he needs to do mail-in, and he said that he needed it "now" and couldn't wait. well, he should've seen his doctor when he was on his last refill, no? but our over-priced refill saga doesn't end there...he doesn't get it transferred in enough time to the mail-in and ends up without the meds for over 2 weeks and with a sinus infection from having all that snot festering up in his head. Men.

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