Monday, February 11

Psst . . . Sleep is Good

Ever since Alexis figured out the trick to wandering the house at all hours of the night, she's been a regular night owl. There have been nights in the past few weeks that I have escorted her back to her bed no less than four times. There's never a fight involved. It's sort of like when a wee little prop plane accidentally veers into restricted air space. The wee little prop plane is perfectly happy to oblige the big nasty fighter planes that are sent to escort it out of harms way. My wee little prop plane goes right back to sleep without a single shot ever being fired. But as she's a Toddler and much more stubborn than that prop plane, she gives it a try again in a few hours. I guess she just wants to see if she can catch me with my Momdar turned off.

Her wandering has, thus far, mostly consisted of wearing a path in the carpet between her room and where us parental units sleep. Back and forth we go, over and over. The most likely reason for her restricted airspace is the fact that I slap a baby gate up at the top of the stairs, so there's really nowhere to go other than our room. I've forgotten the gate a few times (and promptly freaked out when I realized what I had done--the stairs are about three feet outside of her bedroom door and I fear that she will someday fall down those stairs), but I think she thinks it's there, so she doesn't bother to try heading for the kitchen to root for her beloved fruit snacks.

Except for Saturday night. Daddy was sound asleep right where he belonged. Alexis was sleeping in her bed where she belonged. I was sitting on the couch downstairs working on screwing up my blog (It ain't staying this way, peeps. While I like it and all, it doesn't feel like "home." I'm going to have to give it another go.) Alexis must have awakened and realized that there were lights on downstairs. The second I heard her door pop open, I knew I was in trouble. When I heard the familiar sounds of her bum hitting the landing and her feet sliding her forward, I rushed to shut off all the lights.

As I sat in the dark, I could hear her itty bitty feet clamber across the wood floor. She softly chanted, "Mommy" to keep the dogs from attacking. I waited. And waited some more. She had no idea I was sitting ten feet from her as she stood, still softly chanting, "Mommy." Well, until I accidentally blurted, "Go back to bed, Alexis" that is.

I slapped my hand over my mouth faster than you can say gummy worms, but it was too late. The words had been spoken. I sighed and waited for the inevitable footsteps headed in my direction. Surely she would turn into a chimpanzee, latch her arms around my neck, and start picking termites out of my hair. But a strange thing happened, she headed back up the stairs. While she did end up in our bed (Daddy thy name is and forever shall be SUCKER!), I still consider it a victory. The girl went back to bed without her fighter jet escort.

Of course, there might be a logical explanation that does not include her suddenly starting to understand the world without fighter jets. It could just be that her conscious has a voice, and it sounds an awful lot like mine.

40 comments:

  1. Love the wee prop plane analogy. Especially since I practically live in(?), under(?) restricted air space, we hear the reports all the time.
    Enjoy the unescorted walks back to bed. Whenever I tell Gavin to go back to bed when he shows up next to me, he tells me "no" and climbs up over me to squeeze in-between me and Justin. And since he comes in at like 4am, I'm too exhausted to fight, so he gets away with it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ooooooooooh noooooooo! I STILL can't get my mother's voice out of my head and I'm 38!! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Each small battle won will eventually win the war.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey there! Thanks for the comment. I thought I left you a comment but I guess I got too wrapped up in reading all your questions HAHA!

    Your daughter is just too cute. Love the pigtails.

    ReplyDelete
  5. LOL! I love that!!

    ReplyDelete
  6. She sounds like my little girl a few years ago. Isn't it funny that when they finally realize the freedom they have at night, the only place they ever want to go...is to find Mom?

    ReplyDelete
  7. That's hilarious. And why don't you put the gate in her doorway? And military mom's right - mine always just came into my room. I'm tellin' ya, when she potty trains, make her go potty before she climbs into your bed!!!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Well, you're a much more sports-minded conscience that Jiminy Cricket. ;)

    Definitely a positive point!

    ReplyDelete
  9. You are in my house watching us sleep aren't you?

    This is exactly what happens here, even down to the stairs and the gate. We actually do have a path worn in the carpet where Amy wanders from her room to ours.

    *sigh*

    It stops eventually, right?

    ReplyDelete
  10. My mom is always telling me, "If you're consistent, it will eventually pay off with them." I won't phone her to tell her (once again) she's right. Why do you always take my Mom's side over me, BBM? Why?

    Great post. Enjoyed it!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Well a) let's hope her conscience DOES sound a lot like you! and b) I love it that she wanders around chanting Mommy softly. That is one smart girl!

    I can remember the night I said sternly to Punkin's closed bedroom door, inside which she was singing and doing God knows What else "Punkin, be quiet and go to sleep." You could have knocked me over with a feather when she actually obeyed.

    And finally...one question. Why is Momdar SO much more sensitive than Daddar? How did we all get so lucky?

    ReplyDelete
  12. I think most of us have a conscious with a voice that sounds exactly like our mothers!

    ReplyDelete
  13. I love reading your writing. You are so creative. I still battle with the out of bed with my 5 year old, but it's usually for a bad dream or something. She's at the age now where I don't actually have to guide her back to bed ... most of the time.

    ReplyDelete
  14. I love how you used a fighter jet and a wee prop plane for an analogy :)

    Also? I'm dreading the night when Morgan is no longer in her crib. I like sleeping for 8 hours....

    ReplyDelete
  15. Flea--If I put the gate in her doorway, the soft chanting evolves into full-blown screaming. That leads to Daddy whining, and I would much rather escort the prop plan quietly than deal with BOTH of them yelling at me. In our case, it's good that the Daddar doesn't work well, because his screaming gets to me more than hers does.

    ReplyDelete
  16. I love the idea that her conscious's voice sounds like yours! Oh, and what is the deal with fruit snacks? Dylan turns into a maniac just upon seeing the package, and what is up with that smell that hits your nose when you open the package? They smell toxic! I was checking to see if they were made in China.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I love the airplane analogy--you are very clever!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Jen--I don't know what the deal is with fruit snacks, but I know that if I catch Alexis eating them IN THE BATHTUB ever again, Mr. Husband is going to pay a mighty hefty price. I'm banning the dang things from our house. I refuse to live in a house where we are too lazy to wash some $15 raspberries or blueberries for our kid. MR. HUSBAND, I'M TALKING TO YOU!

    ReplyDelete
  19. I don't blame you for being worried about the stairs...I'm sure you read my scary tale about Jonathan tumbling down the stairs one night -- while I was right there. It was awful and terrifying. So far I have not had to deal with this...a few more months, I guess. *sigh*

    ReplyDelete
  20. i'm yawning thinking about you having to get up over and over and over and over and over and over...

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hooray for tiny victories! Which WE actually know are HUGE victories. It's so rad when stuff just works sometimes. When there's something we don't actually have to worry about and screw with, OMG.. what a crazy little blessing.

    ReplyDelete
  22. That is so cute! You need a motion activated voice recorder that will say "go back to bed" every time she enters the hall. Then you can just snooze the night away!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Hmmm. Love the analogy of the little plane, funny how we become the big bad fighter planes though!

    I'm now having problems getting my thirteen year old to go to sleep. I'm turning my lights off before she is! Any suggestions for this end of the spectrum?

    Sigh. I think there's a blog here.

    Oh, and I like your blog layout but I know what you mean, I'm gonna over haul mine this week too. Spring cleaning!

    ReplyDelete
  24. Yea for you! We still have not won that battle in our house, and daughter is going on 4! Don't you just love waking in the middle of the night with a pair of eyes staring at you!

    ReplyDelete
  25. Oh, Alexis. I hope your little conscience in the mommy voice keeps telling the prop plane that dark = sleep. I don't know how she manages to do that. Mine hits the sheets and you could throw a bulldog at him yet he'd still be out.

    ReplyDelete
  26. My hubby's whining bothers me more than the kids' whining too. Drives me nuts.

    ReplyDelete
  27. wandering soul or not...cant wait till ours falls asleep w/o assistance

    ReplyDelete
  28. I hate to burst your bubble, but escorting those toddler back to bed will continue off and on for many, many years...last night our eleven year old came and woke me up to tell me all his covers had fallen off and could I come and tuck him in. Hmmmm. And of course I couldn't go back to sleep!

    ReplyDelete
  29. LOL! Hysterical post. I especially like the plane analogy and the chanting Mommy.

    Would that make me the re-fueling plane to my little prop plane? Hmmm...

    ReplyDelete
  30. Our mom's voices will forever live in our heads! Loved this post and your blog - I'm a newbie!

    ReplyDelete
  31. I'm going to echo Karen's comment. She said it perfectly. Happy and I are still doing the same. Up and down, up and down.

    ReplyDelete
  32. That is a victory with a capital V. I'm already afraid of these days. Every Mom I chat with has suggested I keep the child in crib for as long as possible. Even 17 is acceptable.

    I'm down with it. :)

    ReplyDelete
  33. she doesn't fight with you about going back to bed????? With my son it's like WWII to get him to go back to bed.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Hi!

    Having just started with her toddler bed, I'd say she's doing great! A little wandering around like a nomad never hurt anyone (because their nomad mom's put up safety gates, I'm sure), if she goes back to sleep that's the important thing, right? WAY better than dealing with angry nomad daddy any day!

    Lizzy

    ReplyDelete
  35. OMG! I'm laughing so hard at the image of you hiding from your child in the dark! LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  36. Tootsie--I was totally hiding from her. I closed my laptop, hunkered my head down low so she couldn't see it over the back of the couch, and was absolutely ready to run away if necessary.

    I have no shame.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Her conscious has a voice and it sounds a lot like mine- that is a classic line! you should get that printed on shirts, hats, and all types of items.

    ReplyDelete
  38. doncha just HATE when you give yourself away like that? but good for alexis that she managed to fly back without her escort.

    great analogy.

    ReplyDelete
  39. I know I say this every other comment (I know, I need a new line)but I LOVE the way you write! I totally relate to your posts in so many ways and your writing makes it so much better!

    Love the plane analogy, love that you gave yourself away and LOVE the momdar. If only mine would work more often...

    ReplyDelete
  40. Yay! A bit jealous. Our little prop plane still veers into restricted space, and requires ammunition to get back to bed sometimes :(

    ReplyDelete